ok whatever and i also get extremely parnoid and whenever anybofy talks to me i convince myself they hate me and onlt talk to me because they feel like they have to and then i ghost them without feeling bad because im a bad person i dont care also with past truama i was and still am extremely neglected tp the point where i have episodes just at the thought of being comforted by people i like

sometimes i spiral into a week of these "episodes" and i believe im horrible or either god and it sucks and it drains me to the point where it feels like a chore to go online

okay and the reason i stoop low when im actually upset is because i want people to give me attention snd i wsnt to get hurt back to feel something

i also have gone through months of extreme depression which was what i was going through during December snd summer , i sleep for like 2 days and wake up to my colord live being spammed idk i dont care sorry i do

whenevr i say idk or idc its not that i dont care its just that i dont know how i feel sbout anything because i never experienced those emotions idk okay

i dont want to be mean or come across as unthoughtful or that i hate you i just dont know how to comfort, especially if i havent experienced what your currently experiencing :thinking: i just dont know how you feel so i cant feel empathy

i dont get empathy irl so i dont get it

i also talk alot about how i feel and i try my besy to explain it so im sorry if it sounds schizo okay im just nevr us3d to this stuff

i really do try to comfort people when i can just i really dont know how because i never get comforted myself

i have been through alot and it has caused me to be a certain way okay ; easiest way to explain how i feel

im rocking back and forth someone tell me im valid

DUDE okay

i also get flashes of intense emotion and i like freeze up