I feel like i did do something wrong and your not telling me..

@spicey64 no i told u it isnt you something just doesn't feel right...

@_PUMPKIN_ idk why, ive been open to talk with you but idk why 'you cant bring yourself to talk to me' is something wrong?

are you alright?

im ok i just feel like theres a brick wall in between us

and i cant break it down

@spicey64

idk why, i try my hardest, yesterday was rough, alots going on, all i want to do is talk with you idk what to do im sorry idk what to do

:[

ik im sorry, ik u try ur hardest and its ok u dont know what to do. sam it just feels impossible talking to you
@spicey64

we always talk things through and stuff, i really do feel like its me, idk what else is coud be, i wish youd talk to me, because your the only one i have. deep down.

and it may be because of u being 15 or starting to drive or just being so much older and having these problems that i cant take from u and ilysm but when i think of u i think abt the pain ur going thru and the pain i put u thru and all i want is for you to be happy and it makes me feel heartbroken thinking abt all the stuff u have going on and the thing abt you being 15 ur to old to need me i cant help with anything not u worrying how to drive, ur grandma, ur depression just nothing im sorry

sam

@spicey64 sam its not u

ur gonna change and u wont want me

@spicey64

u wont need me

the momement i can drive you become no use to me? the is no use, your not a tool, your my chosen sibling, a bond that has brought us bqck to eachother though hardships each time, this makes me hurt more. i miss you. i love you. your advice is always welcome, ill always listen, i try to be there for you as well

there*

i dont know what i could do

im sorry

i just want to be your favorite

but u will change tho..

i want everything to be ok again

i havent

favorite brother?

and every human will if you put it that way

idk favorite person like you used to say

i want things to be ok to but idk how this wall buids higher and it gets bigger and taller

it really isnt

i love you unconditionally and forgive you for everything

u never stopped being my favorite

all it takes is to talk and hang out right?

be less distant to eachother?

i havent heard you in a bit, maybe its just bc we havent called and conversated

for me the seperation bwtween us grows for me it feels like im annoying u or ur gonna change or i will never be able to help u

im sorry

but when we call we dont even talk sam its like were losing eachother ok thats why the wall is tsller

your not annoying, your the light of my life

its not u

then lets talk

abt what?? what if its to late sam

please stop

if you worry abt not helping me or not conecting with me or hurting me, in my time of need it will hurt if you leave me, yknow? i love and forgive you, please dont walk all over that, thats the chance ive given for equally returned love and forgivness.

I love, and forgive you.

stop what? sam we havent talked and i dont help u anymore it gets boring it gets grey its a void in between us and yes i still love you but maybe this isnt working for us : talking everyday maybe every other or whenever we want and yes ur still my favorite but this allows us to both have space and time

were our own people

space?

never said we werent

ily too and i will be there for u but sometimes i may not want to talk thats all but i mean if u need me i will still talk to u

so all you mean is just not talk as often?

how less often?

well if we need eachother we should obviously talk but if we dont want then we dont have to

thats all

i feel like you just dont want to be around me anymore, i feel like you hinted at that the other day when you said you were tired of being friends with older people, i felt like it was directed towards me.

i dont think talking less would help but ok. i just dont want to lose you, i dont want you to replace me, and we already havent talked in a couple days

we can try this, but if any of that happens my mental state is declining more

u wont loose me and i wont replace u and i dont want to talk sometimes i need space sometimes and im sorry but i do and i want u to understand that

and when we talked abt older people i meant the people at church

ok.. but please dont replace me

sam with who? ur still my favorite person and my brother ok? all i said was giving eachother space sometimes no one is getting replaced i swear :heart:

i dont have anybody like u @spicey64

its just hard for me to trust that bc ive been replaced by every good friend ive had so i feel like everytime you claim we are distant im on the edge of loosing you.

ty for being patient with me

sorry again

yw and its ok ik u have been thru a lot and i would never replace u

@spicey64

ty