WAIT I JUS DID MY MAKEUP W ACTUAL COLORED PENCILS AND MARKER
WHO IS THIS HANDSOME BÏTCH IN MY ROOM?
GODAMN KEEP ME AWAY FROM THA COLORED PENCILS

or maybe it's just a sign that my ugly äss needs to wear makeup

@felixstayy
You can vent to me if you would like.

dude ur post is pointing at my new drawing ****

also plz dont say my actual name i get embarrassed when i see my actual name and my 3 bfs can only use my actual name

@_kyoo
i would really appreciate that.
school's alot, and my parents can't even seem to think positively of me. i feel like a pawn in someone's game, i can't even control my thoughts. i'm getting pressured to do things by my 'friends', none of them care. not when it matters, i even spent a whole night venting to my friend about my attempts and SH and i just got a ''real'' in response.
WANNA KNOW WHAT'S REAL ____?
MY ******* EMOTIONS

phew, sorry dude

I'm so sorry. I don't exactly relate to how you feel but you should definitely be taken serious. I have known many people who commited or attempted including 2 siblings and my father. I know I'm not exactly a friend but I will always try to take you serious and make you feel validated. Just lmk. My name is Yuri btw. You can chat to me.

@_kyoo
i'm really sorry that happened. just know it Isn't your fault, i know how it feels to think that you're the problem, that for some reason i did something wrong, it isn't you
just wanna let you know. kyo seemed really nice and i'm sorry he passed
it's a pleasure to meet you. i'm trexton
i really appreciate you.

Thank you, I really appreciate that! Most people on here don't belive that he's gone tbh it hasn't really hit me yet. He told me he would be there for my bday (tomorrow) But I really hope you feel better. I would love to talk to you. I think I need to talk to someone as a distraction tbh.

i guess u could vent to me if ull feel better!

you can vent to me as much as you want, i really care about you. id also be up for just friendly chats, if you'd like <3

@_kyoo
happy early birthday!!!!!
i'm gonna be here all night, feel free to chat with me anytime!

@Mellowyellow24 @CroftersLover
thank you both so much! i'm feeling a bit better but i really appreciate it.

that's great to hear <3 been worried about you :(

what time is it for you?

@_kyoo
11:02pm!

@CroftersLover
thanks! no need to worry, i'll figure it out somehow!

we have a 1 hour difference its 10pm for me

so whats up with school? you said you were struggling there?

@_kyoo
i've been doing bad on grades, i used to be a grade-A student, but i've dropped down to more of a C average. the pressure got to me once really bad, and i almost jumped off a building, i would've if my neighbour handn't have came out at the time he did.
THEN THERE'S DRAMA

so one of my 'friends' basicly told a whole group chat who i like, so i've now been accused of trying to break the guy and his lovely gf up, that same friend is always making the drama, and braging about SH

@_kyoo
so now insults are flying round the groupchat bout how she cüts herself and needs to dië, i literally can't with school anymore, it's too much, i wanna slam my head through the drywall and jump off a cliff thinking about it, it's miserable

1st of all i definitely understand that feeling. i have had many friends who judged me for having a breakdown when my grades started dropping from all a's to high c's. the pressure is real and it builds when you associate your self confidence with high grades. im glad that your neighbor saved you and i hope you can find lots of people to support you. mental health is a big problem and isnt talked about enough when it comes to high achieving students (continuing in next comment)

(continued) 2nd of all, that is gross that she is faking sh and unfair to you that people are throwing judgement at you. i know its easy to say but please dont let it get to you. if they arent willing to hear your side they arent the true friends you need or deserve. value your self worth in relationships and friendships.

@H0W-TH3-ST4RS-SH1N3 well if it makes ya feel better ill always be here!

@_kyoo
thanks, this honestly made me cry
i'm not joking i'm literally in tears rn
thank you so much,
it's been a while since alot of people genuinely cared about me

@Mellowyellow24
it makes me feel much better, thank you!

@H0W-TH3-ST4RS-SH1N3 yw!

i just say what i see. you seem like someone who genuinely cares about those around you and you deserve for the same people to find you and show you same care you show them. i see many people like you in friendships where one person cares and the other doesnt. you are worthwhile and worthy of kind people.

@_kyoo
nobody's ever told me that.. thank you so much

it's true!
whats up with your parents?/nf

@_kyoo
my dad drinks ALOT, although he's never 'drunk' around me, i'm still worried for him, he's smoking and vaping alot, and i know it isn't my buisness but, i don't want him to do dumb shït like my uncle.
he can never see the good in me, all he see's is a dissapointing 'daughter'
i'd prefer to be called his son, but his side of the family isn't too supportive

my mom always works, she never has much time for me but she still loves me, i feel trapped in this cycle
like it's in-escapeable
1/2

@_kyoo
im uncomfortable around my stepdad
he's a nice guy but i'm generally afraid of the things guys have done to me, i don't want it to repeat
i can't stay in this life
i need to change
i always get judged by all parents except my stepdad, he's more gentle about confrontation, i love him but the thought of what he'll do terifies me
he makes me uncomfortable sometimes, not knowing why or what he's doing
all my parents except him tell he to try harder
i can't
i went past my limit
i broke my soul

*me

im sorry about your dad, i felt the same worry abt kyo before he passed so i get it.
your mom i also partially understand that but i know how much it hurts

your pronouns are he/him correct?

i dont know exactly what happened with your step-dad but you arent broken. you are still you and just because terrible things hapened to you doesnt make you broken. please remember that. you have a right to be scared. please tell someone if you become unsafe at home.

@_kyoo
i'm currently genderfluid
i know, i just feel
weird
i feel almost nothing,
i don't know what's wrong with me
i'm safe at home, but i don't feel that way. i imagine people loving me, i get happy
but when it happens, it's worse, my brain thinks i'm back where something bad happened, even though i'm alright

do you see any **********? if i were to diagnose you (dont take this as an actual diagnosis im not a professional!!) i would say ptsd.

th3rap1sts*

@_kyoo
it blurred the word, what was it?

@_kyoo
oh, no i do not, all of mine cancel :sob:

dayum! uhh try to get a th3rapy sesh and talk to them abt these experiences

im really sorry, i gtg im going out with friends to celebrate my bday, i will maybe be on 2morrow but definitely sunday. stay safe and healthy and drink water.

@_kyoo
okay!

will do! promise me you'll have fun? and happy birthday!!

yup! and thank you!!

@_kyoo
it's a pleasure!

Ur nawt fat-
i betchur handsome/beautiful irl :pray:/p

and you can vent/share ur troubles w/ me if needed </3

@-_CosmoC4t_-
thanks dude :heart:/p

exercise is good my friend just came back from the gym

yeah, and i talked to kyoo yesterday abt what happened with her brother so im always here to vent to.

youre not fat at all! youre yourself, and you will get through this. ive talked countless people out of commiting and i will be here for you.

@9_0F_SPAD3Z
thanks, life is just difficult right now
really difficult

im always available if u want to talk to or vent

@BrightheartXmisty
thanks, same thing here.

wanna chat

@BrightheartXmisty
sure! how are you doing?

good

i had my 1st ever dance exams today

@BrightheartXmisty
that's good!
how'd you do?

dunno yet, results come back in 2 to 3 weeks

@BrightheartXmisty
i hope you did good!

same

i dont know what the results r gonna be like cos its my first time

@BrightheartXmisty
i couldn't dance if i tried :sob: :pray:

im sure ur good

i do cheer, street and tap

and contemporary, during free time

@BrightheartXmisty
thanks!
that's really cool!

i know

whats happened with u latley

@BrightheartXmisty
not much, drama's A LOTT though.

what's up with you?

not much

just chilling and watching this spiderman animation on disney+

its not bad

@BrightheartXmisty
nice!!
i went to big air today! it was fun

whats big air

@BrightheartXmisty
a trampoline park, it's fun

like gravity

@BrightheartXmisty
not sure what that is bit probably

*but

trampoline

in the spiderman animation im watching, Dr Octopus has taken over Spidermans body and i cant wait for the fights

:spider:

@BrightheartXmisty
cool!!!

i know

do u kno2 marvel

@BrightheartXmisty
kinda, not good though

js sayinb, you're way too nice :sob:

@channylover303
thanks? :sob:
i honestly can't be mad at people. not easily at least

I can tell lol, but its a good way to be :)

@channylover303
thanks :)

@H0W-TH3-ST4RS-SH1N3 im here how can i help

@J-bakugo
not sure how you can help.. but thanks for offering, i really appreciate it

@H0W-TH3-ST4RS-SH1N3 np

oh, thats okay

i love marvel

sorry, i had to go to bed (i go by uk times)