i miss him so much even though i shouldn't. this pain and emptiness is so mind numbing. i try to stop eating and talking but i cant. i never can. i cant stop being a miserable monster, another usel3ss peice of trash someone else has to pick up. i just want to disappear forever and for my body to be found in a blood bath in snow in the middle of nowhere. dying men. crying. blood. evrywre. i just wqnt it to end forevr. pls ccome back. i need you. #vent