(Please don't comment until I am done!)

As an AuDHD lesbian individual, I thought of so many other ways that the situation could have gone, but my thought process got all riled up and I reacted jealously.

I mean, sure, I seem to have overreacted over a fictional OC, but... that's how I got. I can't change my past, and I don't think I can always decide my future.

Lisa is my definition of how I feel sometimes whenever it seems like I blew up on anyone.

I don't want to feel like a burden, and I especially don't mean to hurt anyone, and I really don't want to.

I just want people to recognize that mosty a lot people feel the same way sometimes. Romance is a very popular thing (except for some select people), I believe, in human processing, and I understand that there might be a lot of clinging on to certain stuff that people take interest to. Myself included.

Being queer and having an orientation isn't an ideology, but I do not want to offend any religious people in this community, especially since I have a specific friend I feel like I have been close with for a long time who is a Christian. (Sorry for the sudden mention!)

Personally, I think the only reason it went out of control is due to the clash of assumed ideologies. But also, if anything, I think that sometimes any ideas don't have to be forced upon any specific individual.

And I felt kind of ashamed at one point when it seemed like I was accused of being toxic, overly clingy, and maybe even overdramatic. I mean, the last two might be true, but toxic is a bit of a stretch for me since it reminds me of a different situation I personally hate to discuss.

This is only my side of what affected me from that more recent situation. I feel quite displeased talking about this situation too, but I felt like I needed to put this message out there.

And I felt like sometimes I was pleasing the amount of people that came after me by changing my stories and concepts, but I recently learned that in order to be my unique self, I should remain truthful to my original work.

I can't exactly stop thinking about the certain character and alternate universe, and it slightly hurts to know that I had to let go, but at least I'm happy she is happy with another character. One that isn't mine.

Even if I can't continue that idea of mine, however, I still imagine in another universe, maybe it could have worked out. But I won't continue it for anyone's sake unless that somehow changes. That may sound unrealistic, though, and I will not continue to derail any situations further.

I hope you all are having a good morning, evening or night.

(You may now comment. Sorry for being this way now.)

(Also, I might make it so Lisa meets one other OC of mine, Phantasy, and ends up developing a healthy relationship.)