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never acknowledged my intelligence. i have a few memories of doing something really cool, and anticipating his praise. but i never got that praise. and that's when he WASN'T YELLING MY HEAD OFF FOR NO REASON. he probably yelled at me when i was a baby.

fast-forward to last night, when i was asleep, in my dreams. now, i have VERY random dreams, but They're never this traúmatizing. in my dream, i was playing with my grandfather & brother in the yard. my grandfather was the dad i never had, he rocks. i probably have most of my personality because of him. best grandfather ever. but anyway, it was fall, and the yard was much more hilly than it really is. but anyway, i was having fun, we were running around, but then, it h1t me. for no reason, out

r u okay? do you need to talk? My friends say im a good listener.

of nowhere, every single time my dad yelled at me, negl3cted me, or did anything b4d, ran through my head. (nge fans, think of how ašuka ended up in a com4. it's like that kinda) anyway, it was just too much, i Couldn't handle it. i immediately br0ke down, and cryed. i sobbed. i was curled up CONT

just like i used to, when he would yell. and it wouldn't stop. the memories just kept running. i just kept sobbing. and that's when i woke up. i really haven't been myself today, im more distanced & silent. it's terrible. it's all because of this dream.

@Shadowknight457 yes. i would love to talk rn. ty

I WROTE WENT ON THIS IM RLY MESSED UP

im sorry to tag you all, i just need someone rn @F1r3H34rt @P4st3lTheAlgabralien @m3d1c4t10n

i got the tag wrong, sry @M3DiCATi0N

hey how r u doing

i will make a private chat?

@Shadowknight457 im not doing very well, but im abt to go to bed, so maybe i'll have a nicer dream? we can only hope lol

alright gn if you ever need to talk just let me know

@TimeLime what do you mean by 'ok' ?

@TimeLime what does that mean?

@_-foxylily-_ it means i dont give a fûck

@Goobercat110 well they're mean. but idc rly, i was trying to get info from them, they're a p3d0

@Goobercat110 good idea

deleted

idk what to draw tho bc i mostly draw scary esc creatures and a cosmic horror has been rotting in the bottom of untagged

@Goobercat110 cosmic h0rrors r good 4 baiting peeps, ig

RELEASE THE ABSURDLY LARGE LIZARD AND ITS SNAKE PAL

@Goobercat110 ALL SYSTEMS GO

Did he ever hit you? if he did than you should sue him. i hope you feel better.... and soon. its ok to cry, or be sad, or be mad, its a part of life, it happens to everyone. if you really need to talk to someone abt this, you can talk to me, or get thearpy to help. i dont want you to be sad, or hurt, i dont want anyone to feel that way. You'll be ok, ok?

@V_The_Artst no, he never h1t me, or physically abúsed me in any way. a lot of times, if i bring this up, people will just brush me off saying i wasn't sc4rred of abúsed bc it was 'just raising his voice. get over it. ur too sensitive.' but it IS abúse. emotional abúse. it hurts. :(

ty for being there <3

@_-foxylily-_ ofc

@V_The_Artst ^ ^