@Nutty_Oaks @lavenderscented
sorry about pass the present artblock ripping my soul out of me it took too much effort to make this im working on it though please dond feel bad though ive done the most amount of drawing ive done in my whole life sinse August so its just me wearing myself out

thought i'd just let you know why i havent made it yet :)

Dude, take a rest! Pass the present is just a yearly event! No need to stress or worry about getting it done, okay?

If you can't or don't feel like doing it, don't sweat it! If you need a rest, please take one! I don't want ya worrying, and end up burning yourself out completely!

I know how it feels, and it ain't fun

So please, no need to worry about it, okie dokie?
Great art piece as always :yellow_heart:

im sorry its just no one my age is anything like me so if i find anyone like me i guess i just go into people pleasing mode in fear im gonna be lonely again,
not to get too venty but,:
i have like three emotional supports friend 1, friend 2 and colors
friend 1: thinks that being gender gueer is delusional BUT understands and is fine with autism
friend 2: understands gender queerness BUT her number 1 insult is acoustic

IRL i can only be parts of myself around those 2, everyone else = mask

@Nutty_Oaks

i just don't want to drive away someone else who can accept me
thank you for telling me not to stress, you dont know how much that means to me.

@Nutty_Oaks
Aw bud.. I'm sorry to hear that. You really don't have to mask or hide here, or at least when we talk.
While I don't have Autism, I can see it being a thing that you shouldn't feel the need to mask!

It takes more than not doing a draw to drive me away. I should know, I've seen things man *dies*

But in anycase, I don't care if you finish a thing, or if you are one way or another!

I accept you as another buddy of mine, and I care about you, and your well being :heart:

@Nutty_Oaks i don't know how to tell you how happy i am right now

@Aoilgo
Lol! I'm just happy to hear you feelin' happy man :sparkling_heart:
(At least I hope :skull:)

@Nutty_Oaks you've made my week i dont think christmas is gonna be that good this year (if anything im dreading the 25th) so thanks this was a nice break from everything

@Aoilgo
If you need to talk about it all just let me know, okie dokie?

@Nutty_Oaks
thanks gonna be honest ive filtered out alot of what they say. im traumatized,
my dad's mother can go fvc# herself
ive unpacked it with a councilor but her words still subconsciously effect me whenever i interact with somebody
essentially she volunteered for a supply computing teacher useually on a Wednesday or Thursday she would use this time to watch over me feel like she has control of me and other kids, over the years she took over more of the lessons becoming less of a

supply teacher more of a main teacher in year 6 she compared me to the person next to me ALOT anything he did was better than mine slowey taking away my self esteem
the order of the next siries is blurry so bear with me if this is hard to understand
after computing i would go round her house go swimming and eat dinner, over time i started to get bored of swimming lessons so after 7ish years swimming i made it really clear (multiple times) i dont want to swim anymore but she just ignored me

one day i asked if i can go home instead of going round her house(by this time swimming lesson times and dinner swapped round)she said i could only if i were to go to swimming with no pushback i just agreed and went home by the time i had to go to my lessons i got into an argument with my dad her about going, she just said the most horrific things to/about me "all hes gonna do is lay on the sofa all day" "hes useless" so overwhelmed i ran to the stairs and started balling my eyes out to wich the

verbal ***** just continued my dad sided with her,
alot more happened but this becoming longer than the bible at this point

@Aoilgo
(Please bear with me if I didn't understand correctly) Damn. That sounds like a lot of pressure to under go. You shouldn't have to EVER be compared like that, nor be forced to do something like swimming. If you're tired of doing it, you're tired!

I'd only say keep going if you were learning to swim, but other than that- If you already know how to swim and are good at it, I think that says enough. It's not like you'll forget!

@Aoilgo
She sounds like a lot to deal with ngl :/

Are you still seeing her or something at all? She does not seem at all good for your well being if she's caused you this much stress and low self esteem

@Nutty_Oaks
no i dont see her as much now (thank god) (thank you mother) but yeah the bit that i left out that ill sum up in simple terms is that she forced me to do her lesson work

@Aoilgo
Eugh.

Well, I'm glad to know you don't see her as often! I don't like my grandma much as well, so you aren't alone on that factor.

I'm happy you are away and I hope you are feeling better :yellow_heart:

@Nutty_Oaks thanks

I'm so excited for new OFF content! It's been far too many years.

@rapono same

its okay with the ptp stuff!! i understand and im sorry youre going through sm!!! im here if you need someone :] im not active verrry often but i still can be here if you need! we like alot of the same things and i think itd be cool if we can be actual friends :] (sorry if you considered us friends already i have a hard time telling or knowing when to call ppl friends :sob: :sob: ) i hope life gets easier soon either way!

unrelated to my last comment, i think ive heard of off but i dont think ive ever watched anything on it,,, ill try to check it out after the holidays since it seems like its getting new content soon :]

@lavenderscented thanks for being understanding it means alot sorry dont really know what to else to say
also about Off its definately very interesting in the sense of its uncany and dead atmosphere in some parts to honest this game has in the back of my head for a few months now, its also intersting to see how it inspired the darker parts of undertale, anyway can't to play it seriously the collector's edition looks so cool same with the new banner art