i dont need your guilt.
im fine.
i have a home.
i have a functional home.
i get what i want
if i work for it

my parents are happy when im doing what they want
my parents are happy when i tell them what they want to hear

i dont care if this is a reupload
i will do what i want.

nobody here knows who i actually am.

nobody.
i hide behind a screen.

for all you know, i could be a pe.do.p.hile.
i could be 19 but i say im 14.
i could be a boy.
i could be ANYTHING.

but yet you believe me.
why
why do you believe so much

i need to stop trusting people
theyre only going to leave me

i dont like being alone but yet im always in my room

im a hypocrite

im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite
im a hypocrite

thats all i'll ever be.

im the villain in everyone's story.

fine. i'll be a villain. fu.ck you everyone. you're all selfish.

i hate you.
i hate everyone.
i hate the developers.
i hate my friends.
i hate my parents.
i hate EVERYONE.

if im suspended i deserve it
everyone deserves to be suspended.

im not the same person anymore
you know what
**** it
im going to trauma dump.

I WAS GR.OOMED.
I WAS DATING A 16 YEAR OLD GIRL, WHILE I WAS 10.
TEN.

SHE GAVE OFF SO MANY WEIRD VIBES AND LOOKING BACK ON IT SHE WAS PROBABLY A 30 YEAR OLD MAN

I SAW P.ORN AND HE.NTAI WHEN I WAS NINE AND I STILL DO AND NOW I DONT GO A SINGLE DAY WITHOUT A SE.XUAL FANTASY GOING ON AND I HATE IT

I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT

I WAS NEGLECTED

IVE BEEN TOLD I PLAY THE VICTIM

IVE HAD MY FRIENDS TAKEN AWAY BECAUSE OF MY MOM
OOHHH MOM!!!
YOU TELL ME YOU VALUE MY PRIVACY YET YOU GO THROUGH MY PHONE WHENEVER IM IN TROUBLE AND INSTEAD.
I N S T E A D OF TALKING TO ME ABOUT WHY SHE DOESN'T LIKE ME TALKING ABOUT THE TOPICS I TALK ABOUT TO MY FRIENDS,
SHE FU.KING DELETES THE NUMBERS

YOU DONT UNDERSTAND.

I NEED THEM.
I CANT GO A SINGLE DAY WITHOUT THEM

PLEASE
IM SORRY
ILL DO ANYTHING JUST STOP DELETING MY NUMBERS

STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT

IM TIRED AND MAD AND EXHAUSTED AND SAD BUT NOBODY BELIEVES ME

THEY TELL ME IM LUCKY TO HAVE THE LIFE I HAVE
I KNOW I AM BUT_
IM SORRY-
IM SORRY IM A TERRIBLE DAUGHTER

i want to cry
but i cant
because i'll be pressured into telling my parents the answers

leave me alone
why are you still here
im awful
im overdramatic

just push me away
everyone always does it

im sorry.

@DR-__
if you really want to help read through all of this b.s and see if you still do

i cant fight anymore im so tired

Regardless of what you went through (but i did read it all, and we cant talk about it if you want.), of course i'd still want to help. im not going to ditch you unless you ditch me. i want to help, but you have to tell me how. you can vent to me if needed for as long as you want.

I understand being tired, but giving up isn't an option. i used to want to all the time. i know how it feels to be trapped and feel like you cant get out, but you're also actively trying to push away the people who want to help you the most. thats not your fault, though, i know. dont ever blame yourself for that. people trust you because they want to. the people who stick with you, stick with you because they care. i know they would miss you. i would miss you.

@DR-__
im sorry about earlier.

im not going to make excuses, other than saying i have a lot of episodes and they dont make me think right. i changed my email for my alt so i wont be able to post until i confirm it.

i appreciate you helping. i'll try and be more trusting the next time i need someone. /gen

@angel_supremacy dont apologize, its the least i could do <3 /p
i hope you feel better soon though. im always here if you need something. /gen

@DR-__
im feeling slightly better now. trying to unfollow everyone on my main and follow who my alt is following)

@angel_supremacy oh i see :3!!!

ima get off colors for the night but we can always chat whenever, feel free to reach out
n if you wanna find me else where just ask!!! good night dude <3

@DR-__
dude give me all yer socials tmrw cus i really wanna talk to you more !!!!!

i have no clue what its like happeningto you but i genuinely hope you can feel better and if you ever need to rant/vent totally feel free dude i hope i can help you out in some way just tell me and ill try to help :heart: /gen

@layne_z
im feeling better now but i changed my email for my alt so err... i'll be on here till further notice rrgghr

@angel_supremacy i'll make a post abt it l8r dw :33

I wish I could hug you through the screen so badly, and tell you it'll all be okay but I can't, and it's driving me insane. You deserve NONE of this, and listen to me, you are NEVER. EVER. a hypocrite or the "villain," that's just your mind not processing the fact there are people who care about you lovey. We're ALL here for you. We're ALL going to listen because we ALL care whether you like it or not, you're amazing, beautiful, hilarious, and a good friend Spencer. I really hope you'll be okay buddy. I love ya.

@angel_supremacy im glad and its, okay!!! :astonished: