Thank you. even tho we dont speak anymore i appreciate it im sorry this is so late

Well I appreciate it wlot and I wokt lie I do wit n wonder what I did wrong sometimes but I agree were better off apart

I know your sorry, I appreciate it and I know it wasn't your fault

All that said, I am very genuinely, infinitely sorry. I know it will never be as simple as trusting my word, and honestly I wouldn't be surprised if you don't trust that - but I can and will stop this because frankly you deserve that much.

I'm ashamed I ever let it get this far, even in my grief and pain, even if it was because if I'd lost you too then I'd have just left this world. My intentions do not diminish or take away from my impact.

Finally, I will say, I will not look for you if you do not look for me in return.
I did not want any of this, never, I loved you with everything I ever had... but I believe it's safe to say that when I blocked you in 2018, I never should've unblocked you.

Contact me if you want Lyss back, I will not deny you that, but I'm not sure we could ever even be friends. I'd like to think we could; after all that's what I was hoping for: that a break could help.
But.
Not in this universe, I don't think. We've hurt each other enough, too deeply. And so.
I don't want to say goodbye, but I don't think I can say "see you again" either.
You know where I am, though. I'd at least try to welcome you back with open arms.

I told myself I'd reach out to you once, screw the consequences, knowing very well what would happen -- I've got said consequences, so that's very much it for me. I'm satisfied, at least - I tried. If that... what I said helped, even a little, that's all I could ask for.
Take care.

Finally -- and I do mean that, sorry this isn't in private, i do hope you see this before an awkward amount of time passes -

i'm so, so sorry for your loss. My heart aches for you. It's not fair, and it will never be fair, although i don't know what happened and i didn't know him -- i feel that much.
i'm sorry.

i would like to offer my support if you would ever be comfortable or want that, but, likewise i also very much understand you'd likely rather i just leave you alone.
all the same - take care.

Forgive me for commenting here - i don't even know why I looked at your profile - but I did..

Thank you - genuinely.. thank you