- anyways i uhm use mostly they/them and meo/meows pronouns (i used meo for a rlly rlly long time b4 meowmid dw im not coping meow)

i dont even remember what i was talking abt on the desc i just rant a lot in my midn and it looks so blant when i talk abt what im tjinking abt cuz its just a big like lain road u go down and like idk does that make sense? thats how i view my mind like many little different raddit holes in my mind idrfk

god fckng **** it TIS ALRM HAS WENT OFF LIKE 4 TIMES THESE LIKE 2 HOURS AND ITS SO UNSETTLING TOO CUZ IT HAS MANY DIFFERENT MELODIES WHICH IS GOOD CUZ IT DOESNT GET STUCK IN MY HEAD *deep breath*

anyways how i desaper is stuck in my head even tho its not the last song i listened to? anywas i might listen to ig l8er i got my earbuds here with me in bed so i dont wake up my parents

monsters, redbulls otherworldly energy drinks unfaze me, if anything they make me tired but i still love them.. i think its because the adhd that im unfazed cause thats what my doctor and mom says... idrk,
eeh brain dumping is good for you so im glad you can get it

@ChaoticMess88 my anxiety is 10 times worse and it was already so high up and my heart beats like crazy w/o anything happening lmao it like goes on autmatic w/o being at the right time but like nothing rlly makes me energized but the opposite i feel more tired what u said like my hiper activity like turns on randomly and most of the time it ends up w/me spam posting vents but thats anoter thing and not for now i feel fine but my head hurts so much my cranium could literally blow up cuz i forgot-

its ok 2 rant i do the same when i try to explain smthing -Ali

@ChaoticMess88 -to take aspirin b4 oing to bed so ahaha i gotta live w/ it now

ill be gong on my pc most likely if u want and have dixcod or sth like that we can chat from there but if u dont thats fkne too just telling u if i desaper im jisy listening to music or sth and chatting in some gc idrk if wacks online anywhere atm anyways lmao brain dumping is the only thing im good at

also i think if the monster makes u feel k
like that u should stop
and btw i have adhd and anxiety ect. so me get it

@TheGoofyAwSquad lmao ik but the damge is alredy been done and i havent drank kt for like 2 months but now that my family from ny are coming to my home town i am gonna go in town w/my cousins and buy an massive amount of junk food and monster >:)))

* @headfirstforhalos

ok i feel the same w/ mountain dew lol-Ali

also hope things go ok w/ family visit-ali <3

@TheGoofyAwSquad like i cant eat a hull chocolate bar at 3am (rn) and sleep like a baby if i could but i cant rn cuz im not sleepy lmao

but like everyone has theyre thing ig
also thx i do too im kinda stressed abt it still :')

oof!! im sorry to hear that! fu** anxiety! it drives me insane even when nothing is going on remotely scary!! anxiety had one job and its ruining our lives >:C

@ChaoticMess88 COULDNT AGREE MORE LMAO
BEEN WORRING MY LIFE SINCE AGE 6 AND EVEN LOWER FROM PAST EXPERIENCES AND TERRIBLE THINGS IVE SEEN ON THE INTERNET CUZ OF FULL ACCESS OF IT AT AGE 5-6 :)/srs

well if things go to h3ll im here (if i have time that is) for u to vent 2 <3 -Ali

@ChaoticMess88 BRO I MEANT RUINNING OMG I COULDNT GET IT WRONGER THEN WHAT I MEANT DIES

also i agree appearantly i have super high anxiety but am so used to it that its normal 2 my :skull: -Ali

@TheGoofyAwSquad as i sad ve suffered w/it for like 7 years now or more idrk its so normal lmao nt ven one year therapy has fixed me i mean to some extent w/my ocd yes it has i dont rlly have the "what if..." and "if i dont do..." thoughts anymore to that extent so that one good thing still suffering from depression/anxiety/body image/s//h ect. ect.

my therapy doesnt help much since the person always agrees with my parents also i have depression too and something called rad i think but hopefully if u still do therapy it help more -Ali

da.mn only have 2 minutes so srry if i don't responde :sob: -Ali

@TheGoofyAwSquad oh yeah i like stopped going to one i was goingfor a year and more like 2 minths ago ad went fo a little while to anther one but she was losing for the smmr so ill start therapy again in septemebr
tbh i feel like i had less problmes while going to theray vs now that i stopped for summer vacation like my problmes w/ my family and i increased from like 5/10 to 7/10 (idk if im makinmsense lmao)

@TheGoofyAwSquad also its ok dw bye byw

it really do be hitting us at young ages, i got severe anxiety at age 9 my family didnt know why i was having these horrible panic attacks and always thought the reason i was shaking sm was low blood pressure, they yelled at me when i didnt even know what was wrong or what was happening, my siblings thought i was weird and trying to get attention, and so i just kept it a secret for a long time and just hid away... anyways! im doing better with coping mechanisms now and i know whats happening-

if it ever gets to a lower amount of anxiety, heres a few tips that usually work for me, you may or may not already do these idk. box breathing(its where you hold your breath for four seconds(i like to trace a box in the air for each second the next corner) then let out every once of breath you have then repeat till you're more stable) , tapping, (like lightly tapping your temples, collorbone, shoulders ect) counting, naming the color and objects in the room you're in. these all help at the-

scale of 1-4 and maybe five, if you have any questions, id be happy to answer them. :)