not bad

i Like It

it's good for a first painting but i'll still like :)

Blurry but beautiful

yep

for a first attempt it's great!

Hi RogueRanger! I just loooovvveee ur artwork. You are such a good artist. Plus, I love how open and safe u feel about you being gay- it makes me admire you. I just love you! keep drawing awesomly!
-Clementinefg

good job for a first painting im horrible on this app my paintings are just rubbish

i like it to ;D

Absolutely stunning

Hate hate burn flame hate flame flame burn. Oh and ur gay. :b

^It was my first attempt...

i think it is amazing

I like it! 3d clouds are nice :)

the first art of the best artist at colors!

AWSOMEEEEEEE

The 3d is Outstanding! ^^

That sun is amazing and I really like the clouds :3

can i have your fc please this is the oneily way i can talk to u becoues you famuse now my fc is in my gallory

chocolate duck is so lucky he was the first person to EVER comment on RR FIRST PAINTING IN COLORS THATS LIKE WINING THE LOTTORY

landscapes are sooo awesome. i have one n my gallery. plz check it out and comment.

Good!

Nice!

From the start you have very good 3D skills!

: )

^_^

Lets say I was wanting to make somthing on my current layer on another. How would I do that? (please respond)

RR ARE U GOING TO USE MY ETCH A SKETCH IDEA OR DID U FORGET ABOUT IT I GUESS U FORGOT ABOUT ME :(

Can you please teach me how to draw like u? :>

@Yalmic: Dont be mean, it was his first attempt. We were all at that stage once.

where is ur logo

Dear Rogue Ranger,
The memoriam for your past cat, the club will start on Wednesday near noon, could you please spread the word?

Wow... Now I understand why you are awesome...

@Cookie: You could bring up something about you thinking gender shouldn't matter for love (maybe say you saw a painting on Colors or heard about gay marriage if you're asked why you brought it up), that society makes too much of it, and see if she agrees. If she disagrees and thinks that only males and females can love each other, you'll know where she stands and you'll have to stick with friendship. But, if she agrees that gender shouldn't matter in love, then you could hint that you have felt feelings for both genders and see if she reacts well to that too. If she freaks, you can still work things out between you two by saying you prefer guys or something like that, but if she's cool with you loving regardless of gender, you can ask how she feels (after all, you've just been personal with her, so she pretty much has to answer back). If she's only into guys, you'll know your answer, but if she feels at least open to the idea of her loving someone of her own gender too then you can

ask what about you and see how she reacts. You can make it a joke if she doesn't take it well and then talk about something else, but maybe she'll be ok with it and maybe even feel the same way. If not, you'll still have your friendship.

Then it's just a matter of testing out if those feelings can spread to you. If she really is as nice as you say, even if she doesn't feel the same way, she'll still stick by you and try to comfort you.

You could lead in by asking if two people of the same gender can love each other. If she says they can, you could then ask, "What about us?" Or, you could ask something like, "Would it be weird if I said I love you?" If you feel that using the word love would be too much, too fast, you can use the word "like". One way to lead into this would be to admit that you want to tell her something and are afraid you'll say the wrong thing and mess up your friendship. She'll probably then try to reassure you that it's fine and then she'll be in a more sympathetic mood toward you when you pose the question. Being honest about being scared goes along with being honest about your feelings and people who are told something personal will often be more open to respond with something personal back.

You're welcome, and sure! There's now a private way we can exchange the username and pas.sword for the account we'll share. If you haven't already, go to your 3DS's web browser and create an account with pictoswap.ajf.me and add me. My username is rogueranger (with no space). What did you have in mind for a painting idea?

Oh, and just let me know your username, so I can add you. I'm pretty busy during the week, as a heads up.

I'll send you the username and pas.sword for the account we'll share for the collab in pictoswap. Hmmm... I'll have to have you start your part of the collab so that I can see how you draw lions because I don't think I've ever drawn lions. Though, I guess they're similar to cats maybe. What should the lions be doing?

Sure, I've done a cat version of myself, so I think I can do that. What type of playing did you have in mind? You could start it and put a spot for my lion. Did you want to draw both your ocs and which of us would you like to draw the background?

Well, based an your description of her, I really don't see how you can think she'd hate you. I mean, unless she's bipolar and her personality shifts, but you would have mentioned that before. So, really, I think you're just worrying too much, just like everyone does when it comes to relationships. That's why it's always best to start as friends. But, even though I think she will react well, I don't think you should put so much of your self worth on how others feel toward you. Why would you even think about hurting yourself because of what someone else thinks? They have their own life and their own body and you've got yours. They don't control you. You control you.

You don't have to label yourself anything. Love is universal. But it does sound like you do need to talk to her to feel less stressed about it.

I love my cats. That doesn't make me into beasti.ality. :P Just remember that you're not just alive because of her only. You could have ignored her and her words. You chose to stay alive. She only tried to make you see your value. You always had the value. You just tend to beat yourself up everytime someone's mad at you. Some people internalize things others think of them easily, be it good or bad, but in the end, it's your life. If it's going to worry you and you obsess over it, tell her. Letting things out is a relief. As for her username, someone could still come here (even though they probably won't), so maybe keep it to yourself.

Sure, you could do that. :3

Okay, I'll take a look at her gallery and see what my impressions are.

I looked through some of your conversations with her. I feel kind of like I'm evesdropping on private conversations and it feels a bit awkward, but one line stood out to me, when she said in reply to you being greatful that she cares about you, "Sometimes I wonder if I care too much." So, maybe she cares about you the way you do about her, but doesn't know if she's comfortable yet with that. It could be you both being girls, but it could also be that she's afraid she'll somehow be drawn into the conflict between you and Wolf-N, which she really wants to avoid. She wants to help, but doesn't know what to say. The thing is, you take things so personally that her occasional silence makes you go back to hating yourself. Basically, you're using her kindness toward you as a constant crutch. The moment it's gone, you fall back down into self hatred. That's a lot of pressure you're putting on her to be the only support keeping you from falling back down, because she can't just always be

telling you that you have value every single moment just to keep you from falling back into self hatred. Even when she just pauses, you fall back down. She has a life and can't always support you every moment. You need to learn to support yourself. She can help you, but if you confess your love as you are now, she may see it as too much pressure. Sure, she'll still support you, but think about the additional pressure it will put on her. Basically, she'd be keeping her spirits up and yours, when love is supposed to be two-way. You'll never be able to fully share your love if you can't accept yourself for who you are. She keeps telling you you're not all these insults you call yourself, but you come back with another. She can't spend all her time telling you you're not "stupid" or whatever names you call yourself because then it's not love, but pitty. You need to do things together, to share common interests and talk about things you like. Love's not standing face to face, it's looking

out the same direction, together. You've basically told her she's a liar by every time she says you're not worthless you say you are worthless. You don't say it outright, but that's what you're doing, you're saying she doesn't know what she's talking about. If you love her, listen to what she's been telling you this whole time. Believe in her. You have value, aren't stupid, worthless or whatever else. The only person who needs to accept that is you. Some comments by friends of Wolf-N don't change who you are. Only once you accept yourself and stop treating yourself poorly can you show her you love her. Because love isn't just a word. It's something that shows through you. You can only love others if you first accept yourself. If you hate yourself, that hate spreads through you to others. But if you have only love in your heart, that love will flow through you. Maybe the real issue isn't about needing to tell her your feelings, but to work through your feelings about yourself.

I think that you love her, but I guess it's possible that you feel such strong feelings toward her because you feel like she's the only person who's that nice to you, making her shine like a light in a dark room and, like a moth drawn to the light, your feelings are drawn to her. Either way, you've got to lift yourself up more and not reply to her saying that the insults you give yourself are wrong with more insults to yourself. Is it really that hard to believe what she says about you is true or is it that you feel like those negative feelings are somehow trapped inside you? What would it take for you to feel good about yourself?

I think your self confidence is the real thing that needs help. Think about it: You can't even tell her your feelings because of a lack of self confidence. You need to learn to see yourself in a more positive way, but it's hard to know what can make you change. Hmmm... Why do you think you have negative feelings about yourself? Do any causes come to mind?

Has she ever given you a reason to be afraid? You listed off a whole group of people, basically covering almost everyone you know, even media, which is impersonal, so I think you may be putting people together into a group and distrusting and fearing what they'll do as a whole. After all, if you're just thinking about people as individuals, unless they themselves gave you a reason to be afraid, your fearing their actions because of what *other* people have done. Fear comes from the unknown, like fear of the dark or fear of what someone might do, but do you really not know her by now? I think that, if you really think about it, that you can predict how she might react and, in that prediction, if you just go by her previous reactions to things, you have no reason to be afraid. Don't let fear control you, fear of losing her, fear of others. It wears you down. But once you take a chance, it will be easier to keep being courageous, just like how it's easy to stay afraid if you already are.

So I tell her to look on her third to last painting but you type whatever it is? I can do that. Do I need to read it first?

I wish I could just magically make things easier for you so you can see life more the way I do.

I read it, but that last part about letting her know before you're gone...you're not thinking about sui.cide, are you?

I'll tell her to check when you feel I should, but I need you to agree in exchange to try not to inflict pain on yourself, physical or mental.

Alright, I'll tell her to check. :3

Sometimes you need to take a chance. The alternative is keeping things as they are. She likes playing other games, so we'll have to see when she sees it.

You're welcome! *HUGS* I think she'll be more understanding than your fear makes you think.

She may want to talk to you after she reads it, so I'll leave you to that. I have to go now, but try to take deep breaths. What happens will happen. Just let it. *HUGS*

Ah, not one of the posibilities I considered, but then I think you've been talking about your feelings in greater detail to me and for longer. She has catching up to do. You may need to be more direct. After all, I'm pretty sure she already knows you have strong feelings for her. I guess you need to ask yourself where you want things to go. Do you want friendship or some kind of a romance? Would that be weird for you? If you can accept your feelings, she may follow suit. Maybe some rest will clear both your heads.

Well, you both have that in common. You're both confused about how you feel. Though you've fallen back into the same trap yet again of not trusting her. She says "I won't judge" and you reply with that she will and she says she won't. You've got to believe her at some point...

I really feel awkward spying in on your conversation with her because it feels like it should be private, but I see that she understands now. The problem isn't that she wasn't listening to you. The problem is that you weren't listening to her. You kept saying how no one cares and every time she said she cared or didn't think all those terrible things about you, you ignored her, like your own misery was more important to you than her. In fact, she told you how much you threatening to hurt yourself scares and upsets her, but you kept at it anyway. Basically, she told you what hurts her and you did the exact thing that hurts her. You may think you love her more than she loves you, but she obviously loves you a whole lot more than you love yourself. You've become addicted to pain and misery the way some people become hooked on drugs. You have to quit it. She cares *deeply* for you but you can't see it clearly through that cloud of self hatred around you.

You need to take a deep breath and just read what she's already written before even thinking about anything else. Sure, she thinks you're talking romance or dating and maybe she doesn't want to go that direction, but I honestly don't even think that deep down you're ready to go that direction anyway. You need to first learn to listen to her and accept what she says. How can you ask for more than friendship when you're not honoring the relationship you already have with her? When you think of her, do you feel like hurting yourself? Because that's not love. No, I think you feel some warmth when you think of her and I want you to try to hold onto that positive feeling and just accept the fact that she cares for you and when you insult yourself or threaten yourself, it *hurts* her. If you care about her, you should want to *not* hurt her. So, hold onto the positive feeling and, only after you can accept her feelings for you will you even begin to be ready for any other feelings.

Btw, you explained it well enough for her to understand. The problem wasn't your confession. It was all the insults that followed. Read over the conversation again if you don't believe me. She was cool with it. She wasn't cool with the insults or threats. When you care about someone, it hurts you to see them hurt. Imagine if she kept saying horrible things about herself and threatened to end her life. You would be really upset! So, please don't do that to her. Caring for her never really was your challenge. Caring for yourself is. Make a promise to yourself and to her that you'll make a fresh start, maybe like a new years resolution or something, and try to stop with the insults and threats against yourself, for her sake if not for your own. I know it won't be easy, but it will get easier the longer you can go without bullying yourself. Some day you'll look back and realize how far you've come, but you have to start now if you want that future for yourself. *HUGS* You can do it!

That's just your insecurities talking again. Obviously she cares and still wants to be there for you. She's just confused because it's new to her. It's new to you too, but not as new, so you've had more time to think about it. And obviously I care or else I wouldn't be here. So just work on identifying when your insecurities are telling you something so that you know what's true and what's not. I think you're just so used to listening to that voice inside that tells you you're not worth it that you don't even recognize when you're doing it. Sure, depression is partially biological, but even an addiction to alcohol or smoking is partially biological and people quit that for their health. And, for your health, learn to see what's your insecurities are popping up and learning to take control of your life. You said you wanted to be able to control your feelings. Well, the negative ones are the ones you should want to control. Don't feel bad about your confession to her. She reacted well.

Well, neither of us are psychic or know everything. I honestly didn't see her not understanding at first even being a posibility. But she has said multiple times that she cares about you and you being mad at yourself still upsets her, so I don't think your friendship is ruined. It'll probably just take some time. I know from my own relationships that things always feel awkward when we talk about each other or our feelings for each other, but it's easier when we just talk about the things that interest us both and let our relationships flow more naturally. She might also feel weird about you getting advice from someone else on something this personal. Don't give up on her, but instead focus more on interests that you both share. Feelings can be an awkward subject, but she does want to be close friends with you. And, though I didn't see it at first, I believe you're not really ready yet for more either. Focus on friendship for now.

No, you didn't. Calm down and take a breath. You turn to hating and hurting yourself way too easily. She said she cried because she was scared for you. Honestly, I'm worried about you too. But I have no idea how to get you to stop hating yourself and hurting yourself. We both keep trying to make you see the truth, so what will it take?

Sorry I wasn't on yesterday, but our power was out due to the storm. Trees fell over all over the place, but we were ok.

I read about him dying, or being "put to sleep" (I don't know why vets use that expression, as if they'll wake up). I've lost two cats in less than two years and almost lost a third recently, so I know at least somewhat what you're going through. Once the shock and disbelief wears off, it hurts more for a bit and can even be frustrating because it's never fair. Life isn't fair. You might even find some way to blame yourself, like "If I had only done this..." I went through so many scenarios in my head of what I could have done, but all you can do is learn from the past.

Starving yourself tends to make you not only feel bad physically but emotionally too because your body can become malnurished. It also makes sleeping harder. And your metabolism slows to make small amount of energy you have last, so when you eat again you gain weight back not as energy and can make yourself feel sick. As for hair, I found this conditioner that helps tame my wild hair. It's Nature's Gate Herbal Conditioner, though it's expensive and hard to get. I don't know what you mean by your face being "unfixable" though. I've found that sleep helps with a lot.

You can't change the past, as much as you want to. You can only try to learn from it and make the future better. Regrets can be useful because you won't do the same thing again, so you'll treat those who survive better. It's not ideal, but it's all we can do sometimes.

I'm still not fully over Baby but it was worse early on, so I completely understand. Just take things one day at a time. I know it can be a mixed bag of sadness, despair and even anger, but until I figure out some way to bring back the dead, I really don't know what else to do. Personally, I believe in heaven. I don't know if you do, but it helps sometimes.

Actually, Wolf-N did ask to collab with me, but she also said that she's taking a break from Colors, so I don't know what will happen. So, you think she asked because I collabed with you? That's certainly possible. It's hard to say if we'd collab or when, but I'm open if people have their own shared account. I was going to collab with Kylinn, but she is now on a break and I rarely hear from Dude, so I don't know when we'll finish our collab, but finally Sushi finished her part, so I'll be able to at least finish the collab with her. I won't spoil it for you, but it's funny so hopefully it'll at least briefly give you a smile.

I thought so too. Though I didn't know Sushi was going to immediately upload it, so I didn't have the covered version I upload ready yet. :P

It's bad enough when it's one thing, but it can be a little overwhelming when they pile up. That's why someone came up with that expression "When it rains, it pours", because it often seems like difficulties are grouped together. I've definitely experienced that in my life. Speaking of Wolf-N, I guess she changed her mind about leaving but is uncertain about doing the collab. She actually seems to be worried about how *you* would react. Right now, since Kylinn is gone and I haven't heard from Dude, I'm going to be starting a collab with Firestar (I think that was the username, I'll have to check again, sorry. :P) but Wolf-N said she has her own separate account to collab on, so I wouldn't have to wait. Do you think she's right that it would upset you? I know you've been going through a lot and I haven't been able to predict the outcomes as well as either of us would like and I know she has hurt you, but do you think you would be upset? Personally, I enjoy collabs. :3

Oh, it's Lionstar, not firestar! I better get their name right when we collab. XP

It sounds like you have your hands full right now. I guess it goes back to the whole "when it rains it pours" thing again. Be there for those you care about, but let them come to you if they seem to need space. My only advice for school is to try to focus on the work and act easygoing. If you have a sense of humor, people seem to like you, so try not to show you take life too seriously, just assignments, and that works out. As for Wolf-N, she deleted her account and I don't know her new one and she hasn't contacted me from it, so I guess she's changed her mind. It's fine because everytime I finish a collab someone else immediately wants to collab. :3 Though I need to get back to Bully Free Zone because I fell behind on typing those things up.

Love never goes away, but you can love again. It's like how you love each animal. You don't stop loving one in order to love another. And, when you lose one, it doesn't hurt less because you have another. I know that's not very encouraging, but it does mean you can fall in love again but still keep your friendships.

As for your family not understanding, maybe you need to take time to sit down and talk with them. It's hard for parents to make time, but if they can, you need to start building better communication between you. It took time with my parents, but now I feel like I can tell them almost anything.

Hey RR :D how are you doing?