Hey, @CreativeYama, there is always hope, and the hope never leaves you, you just have to see Him. I before went through this same thing before, each day i would cry in my bed, and i put on a smile in frount of everyone, and each night, i would pray to Jesus, to tell me how to stop all the suffering... but, 1 year later, i came to God, and its Amazing! so, i know why you feel sad, Its because you need Jesus, so if you want to talk im here, if not, that ok too. im here any time if you need me :)