Ahhhhhhhhhh. Do eeeettttttt. >w<

re: i knOW AAAHHH

re: hNG u need to meet them bc mazie is a smol lil star nd ciro can only be described as a solar eclipse hAH

i have had fun w// them oml
me nd ciro played csgo nd dark souls 3 it was good shi,t

re: im sure u'll get to meet them eventually !!

re: npnp

not much has been happening tbh?? im just really tired from e keeping the ol body awake @ night,, makes it a little hard to drive it ig?? but i dont mind

other than that nothing rly,, school starts on wednesday so thts always nice ugh

mikey's been good, if u were going to ask

re: the calls are fine i dont mind at all rlly

oo last year of school !! nice

mikey says hey nd tell ashton i say hello lol

Re: D-don't say that! You're amazing. Hell, without you I wouldn't be here anymore. ....I'm, not going to pretend I know exactly what's going on, but, I'm willing to listen if you like.

Re: God, I'm terrible with this kind of drama bullshit so I apologize if I sound too upright, or insensitive. I just, don't fully understand the problem. I mean, you didn't mean any harm, it was misinterpreted, that shit happens all the time, no one's perfect after all.
Idk, maybe I'm just....able to go with the flow so this stuff doesn't bother me as much. Sorry, I'm....really not the best one to offer advice for this....."' *Hides in corner*

Re: You don't need to be punished. You've been through enough already.
! Oh......oh fuck, I did say that didn't I?.....Welp ah.....yeah.

(Colours deleted this comment...")
Re: Guess if be lying if I said I haven't felt the same.
Oh god, I hate putting my burdens on someone else, feels like I'm playing the whole 'i have it worse than you card' when in reality, I don't. I have excuse to feel this way, I've had a good life really, my mind's just fucked up.
But...if you REALLY wanna know, I guess I could delve into it and try to explain.......

Re:...........God, I, don't even know where I'd begin, but......I'm willing to talk now....Is there, anything in particular you're curious about?

Re: Eh. Well, I brought it up so its only fair that I explain. Okay so...I'm, not the greatest at holding up friendships. I rarely talk to anyone in real life which is why I find it so much easier to communicate here. Anyway I uh, had an online frien that I met on Hatena. We got real close, talked to each other pretty much everyday for like, 5-6 years. She was like a sister to me. Hell, one of the only times I'd ever feel happy or have something to look forward to were our RPs, she's the one that got me into drawing too. But, life took over and she got busy with college, dropped all contact, I haven't heard from her in months. But, not long before that, is when I met you and I guess I just, had someone to lean on now. Something else to look forward to.
God, I don't know if this is coming out right, or if it sounds like I'm using you, god dammit I'm terrible at this. I'm sorry.

Re:........Heh. I, don't know if it's 'rough' per se. Hell, it happens to anyone, it's my fault really, for getting too emotional attached to online people to the point where it scares me to think about loosing them.
.............Ahe. Thanks. I'm glad I didn't upset you. Now, is there...anything else you want to know?

Re: Exactly! Then they DO leave and it just.....kills you inside. It doesn't help that I have major issues with rejection and acceptance. I'm, always worried that I'll say something wrong and cause them to hate me....
Aheh, idk, I don't want to bore you or load you with my problems, but....it is nice to find a mutual understanding.

Re: Aheh. Nono, I'm actually cool with that. Might help us feel better and get to know each other better as well. Hell, it's amazing what people can hide behind a mask after all. Alright, *Cracks fingers* I'm ready to dive into this pool of self-pity/hate. Let's do this.
Also, I'm sorry if it sounds like I'm not taking this seriously, I...have just always liked bringing humour into things, helps null the pain y'know...

(Stop deleting my shit Colors!)
Re: Heheh. Knew I loved ya for a reason. Might explain why Sans is my favourite character as well, I can relate to him on so many levels. But yeah, I'm ready whenever you are.

Re: Wow that's like, the pure opposite of me. See, my parents got divorced when I was really young so I stayed with my mom. Nothing wrong with that she just, doesn't have the best taste in boyfriends......Anyhow, I was the shy, quiet, overly sensitive kid, still am to be honest. The innocent and pure one. I, really only had one close friend. And relationships were out of the question, to this day I've never had boyfriend, or even kissed a guy. Heh, forever alone.

Re: Jesus Christ that is not cool. Sorry, but I have zero tolerance for cheaters, your dad is a dickbag.

Re: Oh god. I'm so glad that I don't have to deal with that bullshit. But it's like, (my turn to go off topic XD) right now my mom is with someone and they have a 7 year old child together. My mom and they guy don't get along very well, but they're trying to make it work for the kid. Now there's this other guy that really likes my mom and knows that she isn't happy and is trying to get her to go to him. And honestly, idk how to feel about it. I mean, it's her choice and all but I feel like she's leading him along and idk if this counts as cheating since she refuses to see the guy but they talk on the phone a lot. To the point where he OBSESSEVLY calls her and questions everything she's done if she doesn't answer right away or says that she was out........God, I want to tell him off so bad sometimes....

OMG same! I'm just.....too goddamn sensitive to say anything about it. Can't tell people off unless it's online XD
(Personally. Idrc. You can if you want to.)

(Nonono. It's alright, I understand. I'm the one who's given up on caring....)

(Ahehe. Yeah, I agree with ya there. I USED to care a lot about what others thought, but since late 2011 specifically, I just, gave up on it)

Ah, here we go. THAT my friend is when I broke. My mind gave up on the world and I tried to kill myself. Obviously didn't work. I got terrified on why I felt like that and told my mom and her boyfriend. Their reaction was to take me to the hospital where I was forced to stay in a monitored 'suicide watch' ward for two weeks. Fun times.

Ah, the people weren't so bad actually. All the other patients were really nice and friendly. Needless to say, I've been on medication ever since, doesn't work. Turns out severe depression and social anxiety doesn't go away that easy.

Ehe. Yeah, loads of people are. Doesn't make it better though when you have no reason to have it and your parents don't understand telling you to just get over it and that there are tons of people who have it worse. (No joke, my stepdad literally said that to me over the phone when I was in the hospital, great words of support) and my mom telling me to lie how I feel so they'll take me off the pills, granted they don't do anything anyway, but still.

Yeah, I know. But I'm the ONLY one in our family with this problem so they just don't understand that it's not something you can throw away. It's, always there, goddamn waiting to strike when you least expect it.

..........Heh. Yeah.....Thanks. It's, nice to have someone who understands.

Heheheh. Yeah.....Wow, guess we covered a lot of ground here huh?

Surprisingly yeah, it is. I never talk about this shot with anyone. It's, kinda relieving to get it all out.

I'll keep that in mind. Though I'm not sure what else I have left to say ^e^"