"Ahhh... the sun's burnt out. Can you see me? I have candles... wanna buy a candle? They're pretty everlasting (for like 2 hours)... and they smell like lavender!"
"Yes, I did say 'buy.' What? Well of course it's rotten of moi to sell lights for profits during a solar crisis like this, but you need light, don't you? You wanna see your beloved's face again, do you? Now gimmie your munnies!"

Your Mysterious Androgynous Salesperson.
-Ashley