PART 1: All those countless movies and books made for all these centuries were dead-wrong, the very cliche of aliens being far smarter and advanced then "puny-Earthlings". The alien natives before me were nothing but primitive backwards air-heads, barely able to even answer my questions without runnning away to chase butterflies. As I sat in that ill-build hut trying to look over possible locations on a map I've been slowly working on creating of the area, I could hear them outside laughing and running every-which way. Vastly frustrated I stopped what I was doing and walked outside to try to get as far away from their noise as possible. I couldn't believe it had only been two weeks, to me it felt like an eternity. When my oxygen ran out sooner then expected at the end of the second day, I was relieved to find that this planet had near-Earth like atmosphere levels. Thankfully the food here was also edible to humans, though the term "food" would be a bit of a stretch of the word

PART 2: What the natives called "food" I called tasteless slop, only tasting slightly less nasty then raw sewage. For the last week or so I searched and combed the area for any traces of escape-pods or the other crew members. Though having little luck finding traces of my co-workers, the natives themselves were in little short-supply. Everywhere I went they'd be following and wearing their overly-sincre smiles, after a while it went from annoying to slightly creepy. From what I gathered from my searches it seemed as though the entire area was covered in almost picturesque forests dotted with native villages. Every village seemed the same and they all were build almost on the exact same pattern as if you copy-and-pasted the villages. Had I only been a little less driven on only focusing on my search perhaps I would have noticed how su.spi.cous all the village layouts were.

PART 3: It was late in the afternoon when it happened, I was walking back from the forest and into one of the villages empty-handedly. As always the villagers were sitting around, scrbbling in the dirt, or doing idiotic cart-wheels like a bunch of sugar charched kindergarteners. Once again many of them ran up to me while singing-out "It's Ice Bat! It's Ice Bat! Ice Bat is back again!". I don't know how the whole "Ice Bat" thing got started, but supposedly one of the natives claimed that spirits told her that my "true" name was Ice Bat. As I walked past them I noticed one of them was holding a coffee mug, upon the mug were the words "Life's Too Short For Just Coffee Alone". I instantly recognised it as Philip's cup, without thinking I grabbed the cup away and said "Were did you get this?!". The ugly deer-man looked dumbly at me and pointed to the west while saying "Steel Cat gave me it for a sweet-fruit. Go give him a leaf and he give you a boot".

PART 4: Sure enough I saw the one they called Steel Cat standing at the far end of the village, I could clearly see him with a pair of yellow shorts worn on his head like some ugly hat. As I got closer I instantly recognised them as Johnson's "lucky" shorts, the ones he swore gave him the best of luck when playing against the rest of us in cards. The creature turned slowly towards me while weezing heavily and coughing, the rays of the sun illuminating the vapor clouds of his coughing. Trails of dried blood ran down his ferret-like face from an unseen wound beneath his silly hat, he looked as if he was both in slight discomfort and also cheery as everyone else. He store at me for sometime confused before I asked him were he found the pants and mug. He shrugged and said "My puzzler hurts, I don't remember, go ask the spirits". At this he turned and ran away, leaving me there standing alone with no real answers....

PART 5: As I walked back I began to feel an itch in my nose and I let out a sneeze, at this I cursed under my breath. The last thing I needed is for my allergies to act up, especially in a place like this. As I sneezed again I saw that there were traces of blood now all over my hand, at this a chill went down my spine and I realized the sneezing wasn't from allergies.... TO BE CONTINUED

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END OF CHAPTER 2