Please, someone tell me whats the point of living on if everyone thinks of you as a freak, your dad died before you could open your eyes, and your friend: your one and only true friend who never judged you, died? I dont see how I can go on....living life like this....

i cannot say ive experienced that. im sorry Mayu

it raining where i live right now.

I had four close family members pass in a year. I know what pain is and I'm not putting my pain above yours. This is the part where faith steps in. To those that trust God. If you have a bible, I urge you to read the book of 'Job'. He lost everything and It's a pretty long book. It may help.

thats my favorite book! job is great!

.....

i hope you feel better soon

thanks....

this girl really seemed to care about you. It made you this upset about losing her... I think you should cherish that. I think she would rather see you happy than sad. be happy and live your life. give it meaning. for her.

I hope you feel better soon :)

believe me: I I know-she would want that and I want to-I try soo hard to, but how can I? She ment the world to me! She was always-there for me. And even if by some huge luck I find another friend: they wont be like Tracy. There'll never be another like her...

well you might not ever have another friend like her, but I'm sure that you can make new friends. you just have to look for them... that's the hard part for me though, honestly X( i cant talk to people...

YOU DONT UNDERSTAND! IM A FREAK! A FREAKEN SKINNY, UGLY, FREAK FROM JAPAN! I DONT EVEN BELONG HERE! FREAK, DUMBA.SS, SHI.TFACE, UGLY: I'VE HEARD THEM ALL! WANNA SEE ME FOR YOURSELF?! GO TO WATTPAD: SEARCH @Utada-Mayu, THEN LOOK AT A BOOK WITH MY PIC ON IT! THEN YOU TELL ME THAT YOU DONOT SEE A FREAK?! OK?!

I-I'm sorry... ;-; I shouldn't have said anything...

but is that really you there?? You don't look like a freak to me... you look pretty...

why do you think you are a freak?

I dont think:I know. I hear it all the time....srry for yelling....

Im not pretty at all. If I were, I would already have someone special. But as 17 years past: I dont...

but you can't let other people tell you who you are, and what they say get to you! if you do, they win, and you lose :/

I've seen many ugly girls get boyfriends XD i dunno how... desperation? youre not ugly though! you'll find a guy that appreciates you X) if they don't, they aren't worth it.

i love creepy pasta

i agree with tatolopey. i think you are really pretty. if you want to know details, ill go there and tell you exactly how beautiful you are. if you or anyone else thinks otherwise, then thats a go.d.amned tragedy. you are also very nice to talk to. the fact is, ive actually considered trying to get in a relationship with you even though i dont believe in long distance relationships. that ended the night holo came out because of what she said. i have the same problem that you do socially. people call me weird a lot where i live but i learned not to care... look last year, in the beginning of summer, i went up the san bernardino mountains to work at a boy scout camp that ive been working at seasonaly since 2008, when i got up there, the first thing everybody did was ask me if my brother was coming to camp this year or not. after that they asked me when he would be coming up. after that they were done with me. nobody really cared that i was up there that year, instead they wanted information on my brother. when my brother finaly did come, they stopped talking to me and became busy greeting him. somone told me this later on in the week when they found me being depressed on the bench outside pushing over my water bottle constantly. you have to not care what other people think, and its probably the hardest lesson you will ever learn, but you need to learn it. so far im still having trouble with it myself since my ex left me to go find a girl[go ahead and laugh at me, the same way my family did when they found out about it] but im doing it. i never care about people who call me weird or ugly[even my own sister does this to me regularly]. if they think you are weird or ugly, why does that effect you? i usually go out alone if im not with my family. nobody contacts me to hang out or anything like that. i havent heard from almost anyone i knew in high school or middle school in almost a year. i dont have friends that try to talk to me either.

so please dont leave... i would miss your art. i would also miss our convorsations. nobody else really talks to me here.

I-I dont know how to respond to all of you...you are all very kind-too kind for someone like me....I dont deserve all this. Why is it when chating with people online, they're nice and kind to you: but in the real world, everyones a jerk and mean? Are-you guy just saying nice things just to cheer me up or something?

Dont awenser that. Dont know why I asked something that stupid.

(reply from comment on my drawing) oh XD thanks! :)

What have you done to not deserve our kindness? :)

well everyone who is nice online is a real person somewhere XD its just that they're so few in numbers and seperated by fate. They tend to end up online with no one else to talk to because they were cast away by mean spirited people.

but I haven't run into any particularly mean people. Some are even nice and talk to me. but most just leave me alone :/ the people who have treated me the worst in life are my family XD I still love them all though. mostly. X)

are you calling me a liar?

wolf, was that directed at me O_o

well finally getting back to you, and responding to a previous question of yours. No. I would talk to anyone the same in life as I would on the internet

I know it's way too late to be saying this, but, I saw that picture, too. You're beautiful. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. No matter what people say, just remember: while physical beauty, which you have, is only skin deep, it's what's on the inside that counts. You're nice, and fun to talk to, and you have so many amazing talents! Even though absolutely nobody's perfect, your definitely a really great person. (^u^)