Dude we are NOT compadible.

Read the 10 steps thing, then read yours.

You're like my oppisite though.

Yeah, that's the only thing I disagreed with. I don't want power at all!

Remember when we had that arguement over which one of us would be dominent in a relationship?

It's obviously you who is the dominent one...
By the way... I love how even now when we aren't romantic with each other you're still the dominent one...

And I don't want all that emotional crap you scorpios love. And the jelouse stuff, and just about everything else.

I still like you as a friend and everything but duuuuude, no way in hell are we compadible.

One day I'm expecting you to wrap a rope around my neck and use it as a leash...

Oddly, I find that concept of being owned to be pleasurable...

I'm dominent always. Even in friendships XD.

I just want to be the leader and I don't have the patience to be submissive.
(did you read the 10 steps thing?)

Oh yeah?
(Watch this blow up in my face.)
And what zodiac sign is Grant?
(And what about Seil?)

Yes...
(No)

Wait a second!

If we aren't compatable at all then how are we friends? And how wpuld you explain the fact that I still like you... sort of... like... that...
...
...
...
I'm going to shut up now...

I don't want to own the other in a relationship. I crave the independance.

You can have feelings yeah, but a real relationship between us would most likely fail.

I agree with that actually.

Seriously Revo, read it.

It DESCRIBES me.

Aiyanna is an Aries and she is 100 percent exactly like one.

I've just grown to the point that even I'm sick of dealing with myself...

Ok, that's a lie.

But I don't want to have to go through thick and thin if I know that I have to do so alone.

(Gee, I think I should socialize with the public more, then maybe I can learn how to use the word "you" again...)

Agree with what?

And what zodiac sign is Grant?

(I'll read the article tommorow.)

Grrrrr enough of that.

You know, it would probably help both of us if you understood that sometimes when I say things in the midst of conversation (or otherwise) I'm merely talking to myself.

Agree that a relationship with us would never work out.

And idk Grant's.

Could you pin-point exactly what you're growling at?

(I'm assuming it is the part in the parenthesis?)

...
I think out loud for the most part...

The whole society thing.
Just no.

Ok, I'm getting a bit tired, but I have one question before I go to sleep...

What are you going to do if Grant is a Scorpio?

(Wouldn't make much sense if you two were in the same nursery... but what if?)

...
Note to self:
Shut the h-e-double hoceysticks up!

Additional note:
Don't let Raven read these notes!

Idk, he sure doesn't act like a scorpio.
I don't care the sun sign if it doesn't match the personality.

bye

...

Um...
Right...
I...

I didn't read the article on Scorpio thouroughly...

Eh-heh-heh...
um...

-gone-

Oh wait!

-hugs-

That's for not huging me last time!

It's been so long since we've talked last...
(12 days which to me have felt like countless eons)

I know I said I wouldn't talk before our next chat, and that I'd give you the first word, but I just can't take it anymore! I feel so lonely & depressed, and I just can't shake it! I've tried to talk to otgers, but they don't care about me like you used to. They just laugh at my weakness when I ask for help. I feel like you're the only one who cared and I chased you away... I feel so unwanted and unneeded in my society. But I don't care about my feelings! I just want to see you again, and to know you still remrmber me. I want you to be happy no matter what it takes. I don't care if you hate me now, I just want to hear your wise council again. I miss you Chloe...

I feel like if I wait here it will either prompt her to come and bless me with her presence, or cause her to flee and re-afferm my thought that I may have done something to drive her away...

(Who am I talking to?)

-very dramitically rolls eyes and sarcasticly claps hands-

Well, looks like she's either coming or already here...

But now I don't know anything I could say which wouldn't be incredibly awkward...

Can't a lonely boy miss his favorite person?

congratulations Revo,

you've become the clingiest person to someone you met overline.

...
Is there an award for that?

Can't a lonley boy have a bit of dignity?

No award.

Unless you can't the fact that you're very pathetic right now.

I took a quiz that was supposed to determine the likelyhood that I might have a personality disorder...

Besides the fact that the results showed that I probably have all of them,
it said that it is very very very likely I am dependant on others.

But who cares about me? How have you been?

Whatever, I'm in a bi-polar mood.

And grumpy because AGAIN Grant shows nada intrest.

Sc.rew the system.

oh shut up you don't have a personality disorder.

I'm not taking that crap today k?

See, now I'd say something I told my sister yesterday, but I don't want to be self-absorbed...

I'm lonley 80 percent of the time. And if I can manage you sure as hell can.

Got it, no crap.

(I never said I agreed with the quiz or that it was right...)

ITS NOT SELF ABSORBED ITS JUST TIREING IDIOCY

NO ONE WANTS TO HEAR ABOUT HOW HORRID YOU ARE OR ABOUT HOW MUCH PITY YOU HAVE ON YOURSELF

JUST. SHUT. UP.

What about the other 20 percent?

I'm pretending to have fun with friends and family. Really I haven't been lonley lately.

I actually wish people would back the fahk up and give me some space.

I'm sick of all the socialization. And trust me I'm not anti-social but IF YOU JUST CAN NOT GIVE ME SOME SPACE I take the agitation out on others and act like an as.shole.

Aiyanna thinks I'm an anti-social biyatch now.

You sound like my sister...
And she doesn't make empty threats!

...
Sorry...?

That's what's really bothering me. I hate to say it, but Aiyanna won't leave me alone.

And I'm not mad at her. More I am mad at the fact that I'm not getting space.

So wait...
You came here, where I am, because you wanted space?

And then there's hormones. I know I blush everytime I think of Grant. Which is happening more frequently now.

That personally makes no sense what-so-ever, but I won't question your logic...
(out loud)

I don't mind talking over line oAo

That's different. And it's mostly Aiyanna.

Must be nice...
and terrible...
Nicely terrible, that's how it must be.

Really, I want to be alone in my room away from the people I know.

And I don't want to spend 70 percent of my time with Aiyanna. Really I'm done.

Well if you're alone in your room who's gonna rub your back, and make you smile, and lift you up when you're feeling down and make your frowns dissapear?

At the moment, no one but myself.

Grant ain't intrested. >->

But I can manage my own feelings.

I would do it willingly in your/Grant's place, but we haven't invented transporters...

And I'm busy keeping everyone else happy. e-e

Alright, I'll make myself happy later.

I keep forgetting what I'm going to say...
and what I said...

and what other people say...

Sorry, talking to myself for a moment there...

Grrrrr you would judge me immensly. Trust me, I act like I'm as stupid as the upperclassmen.

So um...
Here's a question.

What do you want out of life?

I mean, like...

Where do you want to live?
Do you plan to ever get married?
What job do you want?
Stuff like that...

And then my teacher

oo my teacher

FAHK MY OVER-CRITSIZAL TEACHER

A KID CAN ONLY TAKE SO MUCH CRITISIZM.

I wouldn't judge that.

At times I sometimes make myself the public fool just so that others can get an easy laugh...

...
(The worst part is knowing that I literally can't do anything to help...)

I want to be an entertainer. And I do not want a normal life, aka: have a day job with two kids and a nice husband.

No, I want a full on adventure rising into fame and fortune. That may sound greedy but I want to entertain millions with music stories acting and writing. I know I can do and I can see myself clear as day.

As for marraige. I won't marry right away. Too much of a free spirit. XD
I don't want kids.
The end.
I never will have kids.
The end.

I know you want a calm simple life with kids and a romantic, clean, relationship with an amazing wife.

"I don't want kids"
I'm always surprized when people say that...

(Probably because most people are per.ve.rts.)

Don't forget the fact that I don't have a clue about what job I want!

I never said I will never have a lover. I just don't want kids.

Yeah but still...

I honestly want to be a musician. The lead singer of a band really. And work alongside a skilled tune writer that I can team up with as a lyricist.

We gon be hot.

Nyeh...
Acctually, I don't want to talk about that...

It makes me uncomfortable.

I GON BE A STAR REVO

I GON BE A STAR

A person at my school, Dominic Anello, wants to be a song writter...

If you ever meet him, slap him silly for me, ok?

I think I'll start as a comedy/music artist on youtube.

And work myself from there.

I'll probably end up some sort of billionaire capitalist businessman...

At least that's what's expected of me...
...

That reminds me,
a quick question,
Do you think I'd make a good president?

What's wrong with wanting to be a song writer.

I think Dominick could do it.

uh.....

no

When you become a star, I'm gonna be like...
"I knew that person..."

Dominic is annoying and a bully to me...

And was that a no to me being a president?

You would not be a good president.

You're destined to do great things. But being in a presidental form of authority is not one of them.

A lot of people have told me they think I'd make a good president, but at the same time they think I'd be some sort of dictator/overlord and en.sl.ave the population...
-twirls wine glass-
Small world, isn't it?

Yeah, I don't think I have the confidence to be in authority...

Trust me Dominic is not as bad as the kids on my school.

During lunch the other day. A group of kids ran up to me. One of the girls told me this was a dare. Then she turned around and started twerking (a danve where you basically hum.p someone with your but.t) on me.
I pushed her and kicked her away at the same time so that she crashed into a table.

All of it was caught on video. Someone edited so that there was rap music playing behind it. And it was put on Instagram.

...
Can I nuke your school?

Well let's compare the two...

Students at my school bully me and are stupid.

Students at yours are incredibly stupid and won't leave anyone alone...

ehh...
I think you DO have it worse here...

you kissed Candie?

Who's that chick?

No.
No you can't.

I swear, I think the students at my school are per.ve.rts, then your school must have like... per.ver.ts on steroids!

I'm... so... sorry... for... you...!

You're school doesn't have students smoking.

But at least mine has arts and comedy.

Huh, oh, just an aquantance.

I wanted to cause chaos...
I failed...

But the next day my brother was baker acted and then chaos really started...

Some of the per.verted jokes the kids make are REALLY funny. And I mean laughing til you drop funny.

My school has students smoking!

The air is like poison!

Why did you kiss her?

You don't believe any of that about wanting to cause chaos... do you?

Smoking we.ed?

so you like her?

Well, there were two other people around at the time, one of which wouldn't leave me alone about not having a romantic life.

So...
It happened in spite.

Plus I wanted to see how they'd all react.

What did the candie chick do?

Chloe...
What aren't highschool students smoking?

(One of them tried to force me into using cocane once...
It was the same per.vert who'se been targeting me all year!)

Essentially said "eww" then got on with things like nothing ever happened...

Since you're scrolling through my conversations, I'll explain the last thing written there...

Candie said "wow XD" in response to the following statement by me:

"My sister asked why I do the same thing everyday and I told her it's because I have nothing else to do with my time. So she asked what I'm going to do over summer, and I thought about it then said the only logical answer:
'Cry, and eat ice-cream, and adopt 67 cats and name them all Mr. Whiskers.'"

Now could you stop scrolling through my past conversations?

And don't try to make sense of them!

...
Now I know this can't be true, but based off the way you've been wording those questions I feel like you're a bit jealous of Candie...

lol nope.

Alright I g2g now. Bye *hugs*
-salute-

*gone*

...

Typically she's the one who'se pi.ssed off at me...

But I must say, I'm a bit urked by the fact that she looked through all that...

But I know I won't hold a grudge forever...

(Also, I realized that I call her Chloe when I'm talking to her, and Raven when I'm mad at her...)
...

WHO THE HELL AM I TALKING TO?!

-gone-

I tried to ask your as.sistance on something...
But the time for such as.sist has come to pass.

If you wish to know, I will tell you... but it's pretty disturbing...

You know, I'm currently working on six different book ideas, which I can tell you about if you'd like.

But now I've been told that an idea I had in theatre could be used for a seventh.

See, my idea was simple:
Chess.

Imagine,
two kingdoms constanly in feud, in which the fighters have absolutly no free will, and their fates are to the whims of the players. A story told in the perspective of two chess pieces (on opposing sides), who are forced to watch the battles between their kingdoms and eventually lose their freedoms when they are drafted into their kingdom's army. (I may have to make a sequel for this part) Unhappy with their lack freedom the chess pieces and all,other kindom dwelers rebel and begin making their own moves.
A story of hopelessness, survival, tactics, rebellion, etc.

(P.S. It's told as if the chessbord is an actual country/world, with more than just an army, but actual kingdoms living in this world at battle only when forced to do so by chess players.)

^ It's not the best description,
but it's just an idea...

What do you think?

I propose a question:

You see, I one of the main reasons for my depressed state of being is the fact that I feel rather lonely and unloved.
But I do not seek a girlfriend, for I fear I may be used by someone disloyal...
However, it is other's behaviours that make me distrust them...

So is it my fault or theres that I feel saddened?

When I think things through I've realized that you have commonly mentioned the fact that you are a bit overweight (the muffintop) along with pointing out when you get pi.mp.les...

That makes me wonder, do you worry about your appearance?

^ I really don't think your appearance should matter. What truely should matter is being true to yourself and being who you want to be no matter what others think.

But the problem is that society advertises women as s.ex objects. We implant the idea that feeling good or being good doesn't matter, and what matters is looking good. Commonly the media tries to sell the idea that girls can be whatever they want to be as long as they're young, seductive, and wait to be rescued by a man then tends to his every needs...

But none of that should be...
What I'm saying is that society is unjust, and I don't want that to hurt you.

That chess idea literally just sounds like a cleche mix of romeo and juliet and alice in wonderland

^,That's exactly what I thought too...

If I were you I wouldn't do it.

There are a lot of things I shouldn't do...

(And I definately will not write that book!)

But that has never prevented me on spying on my neighborhood!

Idrc about your spy tendencies. But I'm worried and sad.

If you care to chat, now is the best time to do so, because I'm inexplicably happy for no reason what-so-ever!

(Weird, that's my typical state-of-being...)

Why are you worried and sad?

Are you living in a glass box as well?
(I know that only I understand what that means)

Do you need someone to rub your back?

(I'm only saying this in hope of providing some comic relief)

I don't really care about my spy techniques either!

Only...
I don't think staring out the window counts as a technique...

Worried:

I had acting exams today. My grade for those depends wether or not I stay in the school.

Sad:
I overheard this conversation.

"Okay so, Chloe?"
"Nah, too big."
"I don't know man, she's got pretty big jugs"
"Yeah but that don't matter"
"Eh"
"I mean...the acne I guess is okay but seriously"

Like literally someone ripped my heart out, stomped it on the ground, and threw me to the floor.

Last week I overheard some girls talking about how I'll never get a guy with my personality, actions, and looks.

GOD DAYUM PEERS HOW DO I LOVE YOU

Ahh...
I see.

It's really a shame that this world focuses on people's looks...

And my teacher won't stop pointing out how horrid I am.

"Chloe, you're too soft"
"Chloe, you're too personal" (I hate this one)
"Chloe, you're too defensive"

Can people just get off me for once? Seriously, it's my shi't not your shi't

It's wrong that society tells girls that all that matters is looking good.

Just like it said in the book I'm reading!

I wish I could end the stupidity passed forth as ideals...

Do you want to hear more about what typically happens at these points in life? I warn you, it isn't that good...

And then everyone one of my closer friends and family members is on my sh't about this boarding school I'm looking at.

Appearently I'd have to give up my friends to go to it.

Whut.

(Wow... It's almost like you have the exact opposite problem that I have...)

No, I want to rant not listen to anyone else's two cents.

Society has become so focused on the looks of people that even I every now and then think that I'm too ugly.

And I'm a dude!
That's beyond wrong!

Well then, rant away my dear.

I have like 4 actual friends whom I feel really happy to have.

Aiyanna
Alice
Alexes
Cullen

Fahk no I don't have to give them up.

Aiyanna told me that if I went to this school we wouldn't be friends anymore...

it's just.....urgh

People really need to stop getting on me about everything...

It's not society. Stop saying that.

Just saying, it's my personal goal in life to recreate society so that it wasn't so evil/judgemental/se.xualized.

I care more about woman's rights than I care about my own rights!

By chance, can we get Aiyanna here to talk things through?

That's bs. You don't recreate society. And in my opinion youre setting yourself up to fall.

No, I don't want her to particularly see this. Everytime I try to imply needing some space she acts like I hate her or something.

Seriously though...

What the hell is wrong with your personality?

If you have even a single flaw in your character, then I have yet to see it.

(Well maybe I like failing... It's not like I ever succeed in anything anyways!)

I see, that makes sense...
Carry on.

But I can't spend that much time with anyone. Literally 3/4s of my time.

I can't handle that.]

I guess I'm one of those douc.h people who really need space or start resenting the person.

You can do what I do...

When I start developing feelings for a person I typically shield myself away from that person and ensure that we don't see each other until the feeling passes...

^ Wow, I feel so mean to myself...

But that's first world problems on my side! What matters here is helping you!

Oh I have a lot of flaws. But that's the thing.

I'm fahking human! Can you guys stop being jackwagons and please let me be human!

My favorite comment though (I laughed for 5 minuets straight)

Was when I told one of my friends about the conversation I overheard. She said:

"Why didn't you go up to them and say 'Well I'm not going to slim down for your sorry di.ck' then puff your fat out and strut away"

Dayum do I love her.

That's a pretty good friend...

dude...that's literally what everyone does.

But this is not about feelings for someone.

Grant is not intrested.
I'm done.

Well promise me these few things at the least...

Promise that you won't develop a eating disorder. That you won't start smoking or drinking alcohol as a way to manage things. Promise me you'll take care of yourself and not let others take advantage of you.

Please,
I hate to have to know you're suffering.

Well if Grant can't see through the surface and see the extrodinary light of your splended beating heart, then Grant is a bas.tard!

He actually has a youtube account. He makes videos XD.

If you want to seriously see one I could show you XDD.

(Sorry Grant)

..............

I'm in trouble now... aren't I?

I think someone would have to be a god to see that from the way I talk to him.

Note:
I do the same thing you do when faced with infatuation

How do you talk to him?

HAI! :3

Since I can't think of anything to say considering I already responded to your last comment, I'm going to explain the glass box.

For a long time I've always felt the same way in the back of my mind:

"My life is like being imprisoned in a glass jail. You can watch the world around you and its people flourish... but you can never be a part of it."

Seil, bad time!

Me: "Hi"

"Oh hey"

"Uh, so how are you?"

"I'm good you?"

"Fine, thanks *makes some sort of sarcastic comment*"

"Uh, yeah"

Him: "*is talking to a friend about something*"

"*Is trying to join conversation and laughing*"

"*is ignoring not intentionally*"

Hiya

My face is being stoopid.

It's okay if you're out again tommarow. Nothing is happening.

Chloe do you want a Darkrai?

.............

Well then I guess I'm a God, cause I didn't see anything wrong with you in that conversation...

Oh. Anything at all happened?

Dang it... my deppression is back again...

Not really.

People are just sitting around.

Revo. Stop being bi-polar

Chloe, you are about to bare witness to a normal conversation between you and Grant.

You and Aiyanna will chat and I'll try to be a part of it but will stick out like a sore thumb and probably be ignored...

It always happens that way...

Nuh it won't happen like that.

Well your comment about me being bi-polar made me laugh and feel a little better...

But now I want to cry...

Anyways, I read part of your conversation.....

There's no doubt that we would be friends even if you went to that school, at the time it just scared me... I thought I would be all alone if you left.
'^.^

You know what?

I am an emotional rollercoaster! Let's leave it at that!

YOU. ARE. PROVING. MY. POINT.

*cough* IsaiditwasagoodideatoletAiyannaintotheconversation! *cough*

Whoo, I think I have allergies... Can't stop coughing...

What? That I'm bi-polar?

There's everyone else Yannie (totes calling you that now)

Like, Alice Alexis and Cullen are really entertaining.

*nonchalantly puts Revo underwater*

There not best friends. I can actually hang out with you, relate with you, and be happy around you. It's different with just some friends that clash with my personality.

-nearly drowning-

At least I'm not being ignored! That's a start!

Interesting fact:
I can't swim.

lol *They're^

*inside joke* Jeff tries to save Revo

"clash"
Idk why that made my laugh.

Anyway, I plan to make them best friends but meh.

Interwebs man.

Wow, you guys are probably about to have a serious intimate conversation...

Then there's me...
The third wheel...

(Better make myself entertaining...)

-tries to juggle but fails horrably-

You get what I'm trying to say you jerkface :P

Yannie darling we both know Brenard won't approve of that.

Revo dearest go sit in the corner. You're not aloud to drown.

*Slaps Revo* Hi.

Revo dearest there is no seriouse conversation between me and Seil.

Yes Ma'am...

-sits in cornor-

Sarcastically in my mind:
"...
Happy mother's day Mom...!"

I try to hold a serious conversation but it. never.works.ever.

Why are you calling me "dearest"?

You don't like me like that...

What...? Is that my fault?

Dearest friend Revo dearest.

BTW I am not coming to school tomorrow

#1. I don't wanna

#2. I'm kinda sick

#3. I need to catch up on stoopid AR.

#4. I don't wanna

No. I get sad and then you start acting like a mother.

I walked for thirteen and a half hiurs without end on Friday night...

I HURT LIKE F***!

Cool Revo.....why did you do that?

I doesn't help that I bled all through my sleep on Mother's day...

My mom yelled at me all mothers day :'3

Cause she was mentioning a four week camp at the boarding school and I cut her off saying no (cause I was thinking of not going) and she got really pis.sed cause I didn't listen to her and let her finish and called me over contrary, undisciplined, unrespectful, and idiotic.

Not in those exact words but in words very simmilar.

Relay for Life.

Walked 32 miles total.

A mother?

Is that good or bad?

but yeah. I then went to my room and started crying then she came up to me and yelled some more.

I played pool with my parents and then one of my parents got overly v!olently drunk. *sigh*

I dunno

Actually, I don't know where the blood came from when I woke up on Mother's day. All I know is that I awoke with my hands completly caked in blood, yet I wasn't bleeding when I awoke.

I was all:
"Oh my god! Did I sleep-mu.rder somebody?!"

And then told my dad how mad she was with me and over exasperated what I did mixed with what she saw I did.

I'm guessing your dad got drunk Seil...

Revo, don't even go into that.

It's not a topic for discussion.

I feel like I'm the only one with a functional family...

At least I think they're functional...
I never really see or talk to them...

"Revo....when you were sleeping you probably k.illed a k.iller. "

-Light Yagami

-slouches in corner-
Sorry...

No, my mom did.

My family is functional when they aren't on their periods. Everyone in my family just has anger issues.

Cept for my grandparents :3 they're ballin.

Light never said anything close to that. XD

A lot of people seem to think I'm sort of psychopathic k!ller...

So are you saying that I sleep-commited-sui.cide?

Is this the afterlife?

That would explain why Chloe isn't mad at me yet...

They're just all chill and rad like

"Chloe, you're angelic come and we will be pillows and showers of happiness and let's spoil you and rad shi't"

^ I thought for a moment you were talking about me there...

He never said that, but he did it and thought it in my head.

Grandma is all like
"I'll give you all the wisdom ever and happy time food and flood you with oppertunities and help you grow ^w^"

Grandpas all like

"I'll spoil you rotten and listen to you talk and let you rant and accept absolulty everything you do"

And grandpa has overpowering knowledge of everyhting.

My Grandma's all:
Dead...
She's dead.

And I still hold a grudge against myself for not visiting her in the hospital.

I promised her I would.
Only promise I ever broke...

Well sorry to hear that. I can't really do anything.

...
I do not handle conversations about grandparents well...

sorry

Nobody can...

I just think it's a little stupid that I still hold a grudge against myself when I had no controll over it...

But I can't forgive what happened!

Nanalulu's all like:
I'm the best, I know everything. looove yyooouuu. woo!

Chloe's all like: I'm Aiyanna's motherrrrr. woo! Free gluten free air!

Ugh, Misa is such a slu.t

By the way, the fact that you just said sorry to me of all people only further makes me believe that this is the afterlife...

HOW DO I ACT LIKE YOUR MOTHER WAT!?

LIKE YOU CAN DO WHATEVER YOU WANT IDC

Revo's all like: Aiyanna is the worst thera.pist everrrr. Woo.

No way!

You guys breathe air that isn't contaminated by pollutants so powerful that it's like breathing poison?!

Lucky ducks!

Lawl

Dude I have a problem with saying sorry. Ask Aiyanna I say it every five minuets.

People get really irritated at it.

Gluten is a pollutant?

yannie how?

Sorry chloe what did you say?.... Did you say

MINUETS?!!! >:D))))

Yes Seil, it is...

Anyways, I feel you there Chloe. If I had a penny for every time I've said "sorry" I'd be a multi-billionaire. But the thing is I never just say sorry once.

I always say it like... 36 times per mistake...

The town has put Seil on trial for conspiracy.

I say she's guilty!

All in favor?

-raises hand- I!

I never say sorry....scr.ew thattt.

All oppose?

*Slaps Revo's hand down* Wrong! Gluten is NOT a pollutant!!!

Ow! I just bit my tongue D:<

(I love this game called "Town of Salem", and I make an excellent executioner...)

Ex:

The town has decided to lynch -insert name here- in a vote of 8 to 1.

Me: -ties a noose around their neck as they stand on the stool-
"Do you have any last words?"

Them: "Um..."

Me: -kicks the stool-
"May-god-have-mercy-on-your-soul!"

I'm tired. whut...I'm never tired....

Like, normally I have a minor czse of insomnia. How am I tired?

^ Of course, the game isn't that in depth that the executioner actually does that, but if it were real, no doubt I would do that.

Where's thy Chloe Bird?

Where's thy Chloe Bird?

Where's thy Chloe Bird?

Ima use that on Korenn or something.

Ew Revo, why do you want to ki.ll people?

What is Korenn?

Don't ask him that.

He'll get into a deep philisophical monolouge about his oh-so-tourchered soul.

One of the islands......

you know?

Nevermind then.

o.0

Town of Salem is a free to play mafia style browser game.

It's stratigic, and quick. There actually isn't any blood...
(Except on the k!ll-note that is...)

Oh!

K baiiiiii! I'm gonna play the pokemans

Besides,
(Jobs are as.signed randomly)

I'm usually the Godfather of the Mafia, the Serial K!ller, the Arsonist, or the Witch...

I'm like... never a good guy...

But when I am a good guy I'm a Doctor.

It's the one with slav.ery

By the way Raven...

You know me well to know my motives...

I want to go to sleep.
(man what is up with me today)

Ok, so Seil is gone...

Where were we?

I believe when we left off it had something to do with you going to give me your wallet...?

Well you can go to sleep if you want...

that pointless take over society thing. I honestly really wish you'd let that, and the over rulling bisinuss plan, go.

I'm completly seriouse. I'd hug you forever if you just let those go.

alright bye
*hugs*
-salute-
*gone*

Over-rulling business what now?

And though it's very tempting to give in, I just don't want the problems that are society creates. I don't want there to be social cliques and gender roles...

-sigh-

What are the chances that I came second place to Grant...?

More importantly...
Why does she feel that our society if fine?

Still...
An eternal cuddle with your favorite person... Very tempting...

But if you took over no one would have any freedom. A lot of todays things would be limited and illeagle. Freedom lf speech would be very limited. Internet would be very limited. Art and media would be cut down.

And technology would take a huge step back.

I seriously just don't wznt your "perfect" veiw of society to be implanted. And I actually don't want anything to change. Whether it be good or bad. I like things the way they are.

Oh yeah!

I learned the meaning of "Kindle" yesterday...

I was very wrong about what it means.

I thought it was similar in definition to the word "cuddle"...

Like:
- You cuddle with your lover.
- You play with your lover.
- You kindle your lover.

Well now I see why I have such a hard time finding a friend... I don't think anybody would like it if I set them on fire...

Night!
-gone-

But it's hurting the majority of people the way things are!

It's funner that way. I don't want a perfect society.

I like the flaws because it makes people who don't follow the standards and are freaking okay with that look like gods and are awesome.

But then again... trying to "fix" things in a way to please everybody would be next to impossible.
I should just give up, because at least then I know I'm pleasing you.

And one is better than anything else...

Fine, I won't "fix" society...

But I'm still a die-hard for woman's rights!

I. Really. Don't. Care. About. Society.

Goodness stop focusing on it. No. One. Cares. About. Society.

I just REALLY don't care. But I don't want a generic society because it would ruin a lot of very beautiful things. And the "new beauty" would only matter to small groups of people.

...

yay *hugs 5-ever*

anyway bye. *starts falling to floor from sleep loss*

I am pleased

My rule of thumb for hosting games:

"You can't please everyone... Try to please as many as you can and tell the rest to suck it up!"

whatevs. That's called majority rule.

Bye Raven!

-catches falling body-

You almost feel into the pool you tried to drown me in...

-gone for real-

*falling to floor*

(Rule of the day:
Everything is better with a hug from Raven.)

bye

...
I don't want to chat tonight...

I just don't want you to have to worry about me... I don't want to force you to feel bad for me...
I would, at least tell you what the problem is, but I'm too perhetically weak-willed to do so. Besides... what does it matter? It's not like I'll ever be able to overcome it...

It's excalated way too far out of my hands a long time ago...

I'm not even sure I should tell you that there even is a problem... What does a stupid little infadel like me matter?

Ok... I feel a little better than I did yesterday...

But I still had to resort to shutting myself away from the world to let go of my emotions and sleep it off in order to make it through...

-sighs-
I'm supposed to always feel like things will get better, but I personally don't think they will...

Just don't worry about me...
I think I'll be ok...

I've realized, I've been like... bipolar like shi----------ps...! Ships! Yes! Bipolar like ships! Yes, that was definately what I was going to say...

But I mean, seriously, I was all fine first period, angry second period (Durring which I napped), I wanted to cry third period, content fourth period, happy fifth period, morbidly depressed sixth period, then irritated seventh period.

After I got home I told you I was feeling better and not to worry about me, then slept for two and a half hours...

I just remembered...
I have to re-read that monologue I wrote.

Remember?
After you played that mean little joke on me, pretending you were going to k!ll yourself, I gave that whole shpeal (<- not a word) about our greatness, and mostly your greatness, and then you told me that if I ever got depressed again you'd make me re-read what I said, cause it applied to both of us...

(How do I remember all this stuff?)

You know, I realized something today that I actually realized a long time ago but have failed to acknowledge...

Somewhere, at some point in time, through all the years I've been bullied and hated, I've lost sight of who I truely am.

I don't know if I'm good or evil, or if I can be trusted. I don't have a clue what to do in my life and I only fear what may beome of me. On the bright side of my timid inconfidence, I always seem to see both sides of an arguement.

By the way, I think my reoccuring dreams with Caroline and Issac is the result of my lonliness & lack of love, my desire to feel cared for, and the fact that I sort of use Issac as a comforter for my lonliness. (He keeps me company... to the best of his ability...)

But love is what I fear the most.

I've never really had much of a chance to experience love, and I have no idea if I'll ever know of its embrace.

I mean, I fear in my society that I can't trust many people. My school alone gives off the vibe that if you so much as say "hi" to someone then your asking to get ra.pped. Honestly, I fear meeting new people because of it.

Also, I feel really bad for all the girls out there. I don't think they deserve what happens to them. From what I know, most of them are just living se.x objects! It's not right! I saw a study today saying most girls get pregnant in the summer, and though I am a boy, I still fear for my life what may happen if I even dare go outside durring such a brutal mating season...
I feel like if I could, I would try to rescue all the females out there from the per.verted male society, but the only way I now how to do so is to ensure that love runs clean... But even if I did that, I could only save one person...

Continued:

The worst part is that it seems that most of them would rather I force them to endure such tor.tu.rous actions than try to prevent it from happening!

Also, there's one more thing I fear about love...

As you already know, I hope to have an extrodinary wife and probably raise a family...
But what if I turn out to be gay?

I mean...
I don't know if I'll ever get the chance to love anyone, and that makes me more willing to accept tainted love (corrupt or otherwise) as an alternative, just to fulfill my needs to be cared for. Also, I tend to have a feminine mindset and feminine tendancies instead of masculine ones. So am I supposed to act upon my feminine instincts or do I become what my society dictates and learn how to be a man?

I'm sorry to have to ask you this, but you're the only one I trust who I think is mature enough to have this conversation with...

Summer is on to a quick arrival.
What do you entend to do with your free season?

I'm personally going to try and get an internship at a new IT business openning in my town. I am also taking schooling online to get ahead in my academics.

I also plan to use my free time to study-up and teach myself the expertise of massaging and ther.apy. As you already know, I perform massages for free, however I am mediocre at doing so. I want to learn how to perfect the art. Sure it's not an important skill in the long run, but when I'm married I want only the best for my wife. Until that day comes I want the best for my girlfriend. And until THAT day comes, I want the best for my friends...
And by my friends I mean you,
even if we are a painfully large distance seperated.

You know, I hadn't thought about it until now, but a good question just popped up in the back of my mind.

(Yeah... thinking before bed... Aren't you supposed to clear your mind to relax before going to sleep? No wonder I'm always awake...)

So I was thinking, (about when we might talk again, cause I was wondering how I'll avert lonliness in the summer) and I randomly wondered;
What do you think we would be doing if we knew each other in the physical word and not just over-line? Like what if we lived in the same neighborhood? How would that have changed things?

I'd personally take you to a ball or some other recreational event. (The ball because I've always wanted to go to one) I'd probably invite you to do many things both trying to win you over unto my favor and just for the purpose of having fun.

(But as we know I don't do anything without your consent... so it's not like my oppinion matters much without yours to back it.)

But what would you do?

Dangit. He left

I'm in a good mood. And stop labeling the world by what you personally habe experienced in your small area.

The world is NOT like highschool.
The world can NOT be labled due to the fact there is too much diversity.

It is not as simple as black or white or good and bad. There's no majority of good nor bad. There is no minority and there is no equal.

It's way too diverse.

Now stop labeling it by what you just experience. Not all men love se.x. Not even a majority. And don't lable men as such based on a few observations within your circles.

Don't say society is horrid because, although there are horrid aspects, there are a lot and I mean A LOT of very beautiful aspects of society.

So just shut up.

Oh my goodness!

I didn't know you were online.
Oh my,
I didn't keep you waiting for too long, did I?

Well I'm in a content mood.
(Not happy, but not unhappy)

And...
You sound like the Templar... and the Black Knight...
(Saying the world is not all black and white)

^ I realize you don't get the reference...

What would I do.
Well first I wouldn't be allowed to go to that ball.

And I'd probably reject. I'm too socially awkward and don't like dressing up fancy.

So, if you don't mind me asking...
(Why do I feel inferior to you? I mean, I always do as you say, I always say sorry after just about everything... geesh, not very independant, now am I?)
What have you been up to all this time since we last talked?

Awww, come on...

I've always wanted to go to a ball!
Always!

Honestly I'm kept umder a bit of protection so if we did cross paths, unless I knew it was you, I'd probably just ignore you walking by my house and tell me dogs to stop barking.

If we managed to ever talk. Probably would exchange numbers and that would be one of the only way to pretty much talk to you all the time. Since my dad would probs be like
"Chloe wtf? You don't talk to boys"
Even though all my friends are boys.

So I'd text you maybe. That'd be it mostly. We'd hang out sometimes.

I CANT dance never ever fe fi fo tever.

And I can take a million lessons. I have no coordination or sense of body mass whatsoever.
I hate dancing with a passion.

Text?

I don't own a cellphone...

(All my friends are girls... Your point?)

Here's the thing,
unless I went around asking for names until someone responded with your name or Aiyanna's, how would I know if I walked past your house?

I hate how dancing is required in drama and everyone is like
"lol I can dance like a pro. Look how awesome I am"
And then I'm in the corner still trying to learn the first move, ready to cry, and accidentily doing bellyflops.

I'm a bad dancer unless it comes to ballroom dancing.

I remember telling you this,
but a friend in middle school taught me how to ballroom dance.

My dogs XD. Plus if you lived on my street. You would have most likely seen Poppy.

She's a very tiny dog who gets out a lot and likes to run towards cars.

So sometimes the whole street is helping to catch her.

I've never understood modern dance crazes...
It just looks to me like a bunch of drunk people having a spasm...

I guess that for the most part you just need to act confident about it and everyone thinks you're good...

Again though, what have you been up to all this time?
Has school finally ended for you?
(I still have a week left.)

The people in my class are really good. And even if some look weird.

It takes a lot of work and passion to do that.

I can't dance I just can't

White ppl can't dance.

School ends tommarow.

I feel a lot releived.

That is probably a true statement.

My mom noticed this one day and told me...
I have the natural stance...
Of a BALLET DANCER!

Here's how I feel:

Like I'm stupid. And that you'll start to believe I'm stupid or judge me for my habits.

I think of all the things that have happened to me since we had last talked, and it feels like it has been a million years since I last saw you...
Then I looked at the time...
It's been 15 days...
...
...
........

Then be happy. You're life isn't flashing before your eyes.

Hey, I'm the one who as of yesterday won 100 games of Town of Salem.

I am the one who is obsesed with the concept of magic.

I am the one who studies oreiology (The study of dreams).

I am the one who would let my lover hang me, beat me, and starve me on the streets and still claim the love was pure.

I'm the one who would risk my life to protect a friend I don't even know the name of.

I am the one who would walk on foot all the way around the world to make a single person happy.

Nothing is weird to me.

Time flies when you're having fun.

Morale of my story,
it feels like I've been alive for 8 milinias...
I never really knew how to have "fun".

...And I'm still bored...

Really? You seem to judge other people a lot. And I feel like one of them.

Or you're not noticing fun. Try and actually stop paying attention to time.

What?

Me, judge you?
Did I hit my head or something?!

Is that possible?

Well I'm always always judged by everyone so why wouldn't you?

I was thinking yesterday, trying to determine what's missing from my life, and since I couldn't determine an answer I decided perhaps it would be a good idea to let someone else decide for me...

Then today you showed up as if on queue, and that's a good thing, cause I wouldn't have trusted anyone else council.

Why wouldn't I judge you? Here's why I won't.

How I feel towards you:

Today was an ok day...
Then you showed up.

Today is a great day!

(Excuse me for being cheesey, but it's true!)

Uh, satisfaction? Maybe the contentness of being human.

You need to start looking at more than the bad. Start REALLY enjoying the beauty and great things in life. Start really thinking about who you are.

Maybe start doing things you really enjoy, I find a lot if satisfaction out of admiration for the wonders of the world and the comedic greatness of humans.

I think I know why I'm not content.

I have a lot of plans for my future. And I can't start them now cause I'm too young. I'm loosing my patience.

...
I feel a bit stupid, ignorant, and mean for saying this...

But I feel like you'd have to teach me how to do that...

Aww, that's so cute!

Just like my French final.
One of the questions was fill in the blank, and when the correct answer was translated the whole sentence read
"You sleep in front of the TV when you are tired?"
and I read that and in my mind went "Awwww, that's cute!"

Start thinking about how intresting it is that the stuff around you is going on? In social situations look around and really contemplate stuff. BUT IN A GOOD WAY DONT DESPISE THINGS K

.....I do that......like.....

I can't

Sleep

Without a tv....

like

Can't

and I'm doing it right now....

That last sentence in capital letters negated all the thinking I did while reading the first two sentences...

Awwww, that sooo freaking adorable!

it may be hard to say this and you may not know it either.

But you may be se.xually frustraded hnng.

Don't forget se.xually confused as well...

I don't know what is to become of me as far as love goes...
For all I know I could end up gay. Or single... or dead.

So I wouldn't deny that possiblity...

I mean, I've said it before, I'll say it again.
I have a very feminine personality, and I sometimes get confused on weither or not I should act upon my feminine personality, or do as my society dictates and man-up.

Se.xual frustration and love are two very different things.

Frustration can be solved. Not going out and having se.x or anything no.

But there is a method *hides in corner*

OH. MY. GOD.
SOCIETY DOES NOT DICTATE MANLINESS SHUT THE FAHK UP OMFG

...

Wait...
Are you saying the solution to this is....

Ewww...

I'd rather be frustrated then...

And you could be bi. Have you even ever felt attraction to men?

Being gay isn't being feminine geeze. It's about being attracted to the same gender.

What do you mean? What do you think I'm talking about.

I know, I just wanted to state,
I am VERY feminine personality-wise...
(Expecially for a guy)

But as far as feeling an attraction for people of the same gender...
(Oh my, this is embarassing)
I kind of like Brett...
does that count?

Well what is the method you say there is to solving frustration?

Gaaawd, tell me what youre thinking first >->

Scientificly, releiving frustration stops paranoia, stress, realeses extremely healthy hormones, and much more.

The fact that you said "Not going out and having se.x no." (Oddly enough that sentence is a se.xual turn-off for me...) and the fact that there are two negatives in that sentence, and that you hid in the corner made me think you were emplying the solution was... you know... explicit and di.rty.

Just look up how to relieve se.xual frustration on google. I'm not going to be the one to explain it to you.

I don't know why you hid in the corner though...
Afraid I'm going to beat you for mentioning IT or something?

You're just trying to help...
Giving you reticule when you are trying to help me would be like punching a doctor or k!lling your own bodyguard... And I wouldn't do that.

Oh god...
It isn't explicit and di.rty, and explicitly di.rty is it?

It has nothing to do with you. I hide in the corner when I feel shame embarrasment or stupid.

Well it's relieving s.exual frustration. The word starts with m k. Google it.

Oh god, not that word...

I'd rather just be frustrated...
Please...
Anything but that...

Even animals do it. It's normal.
and healthy.

I'm going to sleep. And I don't want to hear about it any more so don't tell me any stories.

I feel like I'm going to die of embarasment from this conversation...

But before I die, there are two things I want to do...
-punches doctor-
-sha.nks bodyguard-

Sleep...

Good idea.

I think I personally could use some more sleep in my life.
I mean, I typically only get 3 to 5 hours a night...

Night Raven!
-gone-

no don't do that. Don't

Those poor people. Plus your body gaurd would kil.l you before you could sha.nk them.

k bye

-gone-

It was supposed to be a joke...

But I don't like doctors...

You know...
I'm not really sure about what to say right now. I mean, nothing new or significant has happened recently, but that's pretty ok with me, cause it's not like anything bad happened either.

I think I'm just going to go to sleep tonight if you don't mind.

But I hope with school ending for you we can chat more often now.

I would just sleep at school considering we aren't doing anything, but I'm afriad that the way I sleep is a bit too embarassingly adorable.
(In case you are wondering how I sleep, let's just say I typically look either like I am emotionally troubled, or I am very cuddly in my sleep.)

But I have one question before I go... And I hate to ask this but...
What gave you the conotation that I may be se.xually frustrated?

Please tell me why you think that is the case... I want to know.

Anyways, Night Raven!
-gone-

Well I just had a lovely read about what se.xual frustration means and what causes it...

Now please excuse me while I go forcably vo.mit into a trash can...
(I'm not really gonna do that...)

Still, what makes you think that that is the case with me?

Of course, the one night you show up is the night I feel most emotionally devastated.

Don't worry though, I just deleated my rant. Why? Because you don't need to care about it and I shouldn't let it bother me.

Well now that summets here we can start chatting til 4am again

Cause nightime omg

I still have 1 day of school...

But who needs sleep?
Am I right?

cause everyone gets se.xually frustrated. No one is special

Oh, yes, by the way...

Well first I'd like you to tell me why you think I might be se.xually frustrated...

But after that...

My family is going on vacation in 2 weeks, but we don't know where to go. It has to be in America. Any recomendations?

Poor timing on my part...

Sanfrasico California is where I'd pick

May I ask why?

(There's a city named San Francisco?)

The part in parenthases isn't a joke...

I like... never get out of the house...

You know the city cause you spelled it right. Therefor a joke.

And I just love california.

Dang...

DANG!

You saw straight through my little rouse...

I know it isn't much to say this,
but I feel a bit gratified in myself and proud in you for doing that.

Little rouse?

hm?

Anyways, I asked someone else (go ahead and guess who...) what they think my problem is, and they seem to think my problem is my dependancy on others to be happy.
(Combined with my inability to tune people out.)

The San Francisco thing...
That was my little rouse...
(Feeling a tad bit less proud or gradified now...)

Well yeah but I had no idea it was a trick or smth lol wha.

Brett, you're sister, Domonic

Tory, that was her name right?

I haven't seen Brett since last Thursday.

I always somehow make my sis mad at me, plus we barely ever talk.

I hate Dominic and never trust a word he says. He's a hypocrate.

Snowpaw?

Tory?

Are you trying to remember my sister's name?

I never remember telling you her name in the first place...
But her name is Taylor.

Not Snow either.
I find Snow annoying and immature.

But you are on the right track now.

I'm surprized you didn't look at the comments in my painting...

I mean...

I only asked Candie a matter of minutes ago...

Wh...Snow is really awesome.

And that was mean.

Time out!

Since when did you meet Snow?

Um... Anyways, changing topics before you beat me with a frying pan or something...

How are you today?
(Please don't hurt me...)

Snow is one of my best friends and has been for a long time.

We were on hatena together.

Time out again!

I just realized, based off of how I speak, and the subtext alone...

I already knew that with my personality I'm more of a follower than a leader...

But I hadn't realized that I'm used to strict punishment whenever I make a mistake...

Have you ever talked to Snow on Colors?

Maybe you should... Like...
(Gee, what day can you do this where I don't have to sacrafice the chance to see you?)

Oh! I've got it!
How about two weeks from now?

I do talk to her on colors. She's laid back and humorous.

I admire her.

You admire...?

I know I'm rediculously serious about pretty much evreything, and that my oppinion on this matter is extremely biased, but I think she is a bit too laid back.

By the way, speaking of things you admire brings a good question to mind.

What trait do you think is the most important for people to have?
(Like.... What do you think is the most admirable trait?)

Oh, and to make it interesting!
...
Why?

I just realized that I write an average two comments for every one thing you say...

I should really talk less...

Confidence because it drives you to do things and makes sure you don't fall into the dark.

I personally think it's loyalty which is most admireable, for it proves how much something matters to you.

Plus I'm sick of being partnered with back-st.abbers in school projects...

Oh dude I need to go tonight.

Sorry

Ok...

But where?

(and can I get a hug before you leave?)

You know... I like it when you hug me. It makes me feel like I've done something that satisfied you.

I'm working on something

bye
*hugs*
-salute-
bye

Something...
It's vague...

I like it!

-gone-

I won Axis and Allies today in school.

On the final round of the game while the score was still tied between the Axis powers and the Allied powers, I, Japan, launched an unstoppable offensive force of 9 tanks and 1 AA gun against the puny American air force of 1 bomber and 1 fighter. In the battle I captured Shanghai, which was annexed by the Americans and took it for my own, ending the stalemate and ensuring victory for the Axis powers.

(Shanghai is one of the twelve vital cities you must capture in order to win. Each team had six until I stole Shanghai from America on the last turn of the game.)

By the way, and I love this.

In school, a guy and a girl walked past me while I was tying my shoes in the hall. The guy, Broc from Theatre, knew me but the girl didn't. As they walked by the girl pointed at me and asked "Who is that?"

To which the guy responded:
"That is the greatest weapon the world has ever created."

I find that satisfying that they fear how stratigically gifted I am.

I feel like it is abnormal of me not to give a daily synopsis of my life...

The past few days have been like this for me:

Wake up.
Bored
Think about things...
Lots of things...
Lots of WEIRD things...

Think about what to say to you.
Reflect on my day.
What happened?
Nothing of importance.

I feel like a hopelessly love-drunken teenage girl...

The only thing is that I... hhnnngggg. I don't know why! I haven't made any ch... god it's hard to focus... changes to my daily routine, and I... I haven't even talked to anyone for the last.. hnnngggg... ugh... The last few days. So I don't know why I feel this... strange way...

Hhnnng... Sure it's blissful... but it... it... It's so hard to focus!

In other news, I heared on the radio today that, in America, the ideal age to get married is 26.

I was shocked, and agreed with the station's DJ who thought that was a bit young. I mean... I don't think I'll get married until I'm at least 32.

Also, I saw an image earlier that had some... suggestive themes... and I was really disturbed... But it made me think... If there was some guy who wanted to fill the world with po.rn, I would be the one trying to stop him, and I'd be the only one who would want to stop him...

Strange, scarry world, huh?

You know what I always think is a bizzare thing?

Preference.

I mean, for example, if I am sad and I'm crying, above anything what I'd perfer for someone to do is not to try and reasure me that everything is fine, but instead I'd perfer if they started crying, causing me to ask "Why are you crying?" To which they'd say "Why are you crying?" To which I'd say "I don't know." And then I'd laugh... I'd laugh it off...

Sadly, I've yet to meet a person who does that...

Anyways, when do you think we can chat again?

I don't really have any chances to socialize now-a-days and to be honest I'm a bit lonely...
(Plus I'm beyond bored to tears... in more ways then one...)

I go on vacation in a week. We decided to take a cruise to the Bahamas.

I seriously love how cute things can be at times. It's nice to just be surrounded by the adorable instead of having to deal with the wretched and vile. I wish things could always just be cute and adorable...

Now, I know when people wish for things what you should steriotypically tell them is to be careful what the wish for. But seriously, what harm could be done if the world was full of cute things?

Anyways...
I can't sleep!

(Ha! You knew there had to be a deeper meaning somewhere in there, don't deny it.)

The following is a cluster of statements that I hold true. I'd like to know your opinion on them.

- "It is more important to be honorable than it is to win."

- "Loyalty is more important than Honesty."

- "Leading a small group of devoted people is better than leading a large group of renegades."

- "Sometimes the best way to teach a lesson is by strict punishment."

- "Being persistant is a perfectly fine replacement for being right."

- "Saving the lives of loved ones are more important than saving my own."

- "Failure should be met with concequence."

- "Doing things alone is harder, but more rewarding."

So I'd just like to get your oppinion on them.

I've left a lot of comments here, so unless you come on Sunday, this is the last you'll here of me until I get back from vacation. This is one final question I meant to ask a while ago...

I want to know,
What is the manifestation of your nightmares? I like to think everyone has some sort of beast that haunts them in their sleep. What is yours, is it a deamon, an arachnid, or something else?

(Do you think you can guess mine?)

I plan to make a series when Flipnote Studio 3D comes out called "Mafia", which goes off the basis a modern day version of the game of Town of Salem, telling the story of an organized crime syndacate and their attemps to as.sas.sinate the Mayor. The series in complete with it's own Witch! (And a Serial K!ller.)

I think you'd be a good fit for one of the roles, but first I must know...

Are you a Townie, pure at heart, hoping to rid the streets of the evil crime syndacate and live a life of peace?

or

Are you a Mafioso, rotten to the core, working with the organized crime syndacate to quash all the inferiors who won't succomb to the power of the family?

Heh, bit.ch please.

I'm both working for either sides. Not in it for good or bad. But in it for kicks.

Btw that whole "Fill the world with por.n comment" thing is fu.cking wrong and se.xist.
I hate how much you put down men.

Give them some respect will ya? That was one of the most se.xist comments I've ever heard and not only was it horribly untrue, it was also very offending.

And America is not as weak as you say. Trust me we're actually really strong and allies to a lot of countries.

And news flash: Japqn has no forces WE take care of Japan

Axis and Allies is a board game.
It's not necessarily historically accurate...

Anyways, I have internet on vacation!

You know, it sucks to await your aquantence so that we can chat for weeks upon end, then to see that everything I said only irritates you...

I'm tired of making you mad all the time. I hate it that I do that.
I ask that you tell me what I can do to prevent this from happening again.

I don't actually get irritated I just like to put you in your place XD

You're going to have to come later cause I get on late night now.

Later you say...

To me, 1:00 am is just early morning.

I would ask that you get on sooner in the night, but I think you're worth it to stay up 'til my eyes bleed...
Just not while I'm on vacation and I have things to do.

Why did you change your name?
(And why choose "Vahoii"?)

I liked it when it was just Raven...

"Vuhoii"... I'm going to have to get used to that...

Anyways,
My mom and my sister are mad at me cause I don't eat healthily and I'm really skinny. Then thry counted how many callories I eat per day...

Now they are mad at me cause I only eat 714 callories a day instead of the two-thousand five-hundred I'm supposed to...

You know, in the back of my head I can hear voices.
Of course, I know it's only my subconcious thought.

But those voices say some weird things. Typically it's how I feel about a situation, or some secret feeling I never express, or some recap of something, or just complete randomness.

But I was sitting in the car earlier, and suddently, out of nowhere I hear:
"I think I have a lot of friends; I just don't acknowledge them."

...
Food for thought...

I'm back home at last!

Perhaps now that I'm back in my own bed I won't keep waking up before 5:00 am...

But the ride here was long and tiresome. I love you and all, but for now, I sleep.

Sweet dreams Vuhoii.
-Revolutionized.

Don't need to call me that. Most of my friends call me Raven still.

Tastes change k?
Plus Raven, I found out, was extremely cleche

So the name Raven is nevermore?

By the way, when I asked you that question, weither you were a Townie or a Mafioso, it's because I want to have you play one of the roles in my upcoming series "Mafia". (It's more like auditioning for a role. It's not an RP, it's a series.)

The roles I have left are...

Faction: Town;
Doctor
Sheriff
Jailor
Investigator(s)
Veteran(s)
Escort
Bodyguard(s)

Faction: Mafia;
Blackmailer
Consigliere
Janitor
Consort
Mafioso(s)

Feel free to ask for an explination of any role that interest you.

By the way...
Based off of your personality, I'd recomend Consort, Escort, or BodyGuard.

One more note, since we keep missing each other, I'm on every night at 10:00 pm.

Oh me, oh my...
I don't have the best internet con.ne.ct.ion right now... That's a pity, non?

Blackmailer looks awesome

(I kinda wanna be a nuetral bounty hunter)

I dont want to be goodguy tbh

Not here?

I'm here.

Sorry, I had to... tie up... some... loose ends...

She... She left...

I...
..........
Wow...

Anyways, I guess I should explain...

Blackmailer: The member of the mafia who will leave you speechless... literally! The Blackmailer's job is to prevent people from exposing the mafia and force them into joining the mafia's side. He/She is responsible for the recruitment of the Janitor, and easily manipulates their way to power when making desicions.

Is this the role you want?

Yes, and sorry I had to leave. My bad

Please excuse me if I start yelling or something, I'm feeling a bit enraged right now.

(On a side note, my forehead is bleeding, but that's another story.)

You here?

How come only eyelashes get in my eye?

Aren't they supposed to prevent things from getting in your eyes?!

Some sort of acknowledgement would be nice...

I mean, you could just say "Hey, I'm painting."

And... you were painting.

Not a bad job by the way.

Of course that's what you do...

You fibish your painting then leave. Why would I expect anything else? What, did you forget about me, or do you just not care anymore?!

Sighsighsigh

No my freaking cousin came over in the middle of painting it.

I do art all year round bub I just hardly ever use colors. Sorry that busy life must make sure I'm always supposed to give you attention.

I'm sorry but,
geeze

I'm actually really stressed and I don't have time to be on two art media sites at a time. You want to talk to me more often? Try going on my Deviantart

Vuhoii.deviantart.com

Not hard princess.
I have a life I need to attend to I apologize for "lack of
aknowledgement" even though I felt bad enough as is and have tried to take as much time as I could to reply to YOUR messages.

If I didn't care I wouldn't answer at all.

You're lack of faith in my loyalty is quite angering

(It's just like Vulpes said... I am difficult to coexist with...)
(And as I said... I'm a hell of a lot needy...)

Anyways, I don't have a DeviantArt, or a personal computer... and it doesn't work well on the 3DS...

You know... we rarely chat anymore...

How's Aiyanna?

I personally feel that things have gotten a lot better for me in recent times...
Of course, I know that it is that way only because school is over and I'm at home all day, never seeing or talking to anybody, and never being subjected to reticule...

There you go again you anti-social gizzlet.

I know you sorta just mock the fact that everyone shakes their head at you and tries to help, but people are seriously worried...

I don't really agree with your nutjob morals so...

..............................

Sorry, I'm a bit lost here...

So if I understand this correctly, which I don't, you think I'm a nutjob?

Were you saying people are seriously worried about me?

You realize that what I said was essentially "I feel less depressed because nobody is there to hate me" right?

Of course, it would always be nice to have some sort of company...

Well, the fact that you haven't been on for quite some time, combined with the fact that you were angry the last time you were here only makes me as.sume the.... semi-kind-of-bad.
(Cause it definately isn't the worst thing that could happen.)

I take it you reside upon DeviantArt now, and to you Colors is dead. Unfortunately, I will not be getting a DeviantArt, so I will have no means of communicating with you.

I doubt you'll recieve this message, but if you by some foreign chance do hear word of it, I just wanted you to know that if this is your choice I am glad you have the will to take it, and if that is so, then I guess this is goodbye...

You always said I shouldn't fear that the day may come when there is nothing left to say, but it is now upon us...

If you ever wish to speak with me again, you know where to find me.
Until then, I will remember you fondly...

Hi...

I changed my name again cause I'm stupid but yeah hi

Nice new name...

Never thought I'd be seeing the likes of you back around these parts...

How was your time with DeviantArt?

Actually...
More pressing...
Why did you return here anyways?

Funny story, I was with Seil (her name is Beancoffee now ha) today and she brought up your name.
And I thought
"Oh, I haven't talked to him in a while. I should start again."]

Meanwhile I've also been very depressed with no where to turn

A lot of problems have arisen in the past few months that have done a number on me I'm afraid.....

Some more drastic than others...
And some you may not like to hear....

Hm...

As for me...
(thanks for asking by the way)

I'm afraid you wouldn't believe me if I told you...

Plus, if you did, you probably wouldn't be happy...

and then there's the fact that it's a long story that you probably don't have the time for...

(Would make an interesting book though)

Though, this is an interesting twist of fate...

Aren't I the one typically struggling with problems and depression?

(By the way... I did a survey... and 48 of 50 people I surveyed claimed that I'm a witch!)

Wait,
what brought you here today?
Tell me.

I just realized...

Three months ago...

I read those words wrong...

Well, good to see you weren't tottally sick with my existance back then...
(Huge weight off my shoulders.)

I'm always on Colors...

Typically now-a-days I'm talking with Vulpes...

He's not the most caring, but he's very intelligent...

Your existence was never ever sickening
trust me I don't see the selfishness in making someone so special.

That was vain

Um...
I'm not certain I understood that right there...

But that's not important!

What's important is that you said there is something that has brought you down.

Tell me, what problems impend your happiness?

(If you were talking about Vulpes, keep in mind that after you left he was the only person I could talk to...)

Sorry I couldn't find the right way to put that in words.

To be honest I came back because I miss feeling special to someone as well.

Well I've gained a bit of weight and it's ki.lling me.

I'm being racially discrimimated by my classmates and drama teacher

I'm under pressure to auditionmfor a top of the line all-girls boarding school in New york

which leads into the 4th one. Which you won't like, and I'll loose my specialness to you

Those were the days...

Were they not...

(This is exactly why I said you wouldn't be happy if I told you what I've been up to...
Eh, that makes it sound worse than it is...)

The 'days' can be seen as feelings brought back for new memories.

What are you up to?

You realized being special doesn't mean you have to... you know...
-clears throat-

Anywho...
(Dang, I don't know what to say...)

It's complicated, all right?

Let me just sum it up with one question, all right?

Do you believe people have the right to at least die happy?

I have to...? I'm not quite getting what you're saying? Perhaps you don't know what I'm talking about.

Sure but if they are unhappy and can live another day and have the potential to make themselves happier in the future I'd say dying with a burst of happiness is extremely idiotic.

Why?

Hm...

(I was saying that you don't necessarily have to be dating someone for them to be special.)

Well, I believe the answer to the above question is yes, and for the past months I have endured ordeals of suffering just so some dying person could be happy for once...

(God this darned sore throat...
Feels like I'm swallowing daggers...)

Yeah but I think there's a problem with that.

Well good. I think that sounds liie a virtue more than sin

(Ugh I hate this pink username blot. I'm trying to get rid of it).

(I wish mine was gray...
But at least it's easy to tell Pink from Blue!)

So what's the 4th thing?

Hhng

okay
promise you'll accept and care for me anyway?

This will be extremely suprising.

Well,
I'm not sure what I'm getting myself into...

But if you need my care and appreciation you've always had it, so I have no problem with complying to your request!

I think

I might be a boy

I'm not 100 percent sure but I feel more like a boy than a girl.

Um...

Explination please?

Not, you can't mean physically, can you?

(Remember, if you're looking at it by gender steriotypes, you're talking to a girl...)

No not physically

Mentally

like trans-gender

Gender identification

I'd much rather define myself as a boy

But I like dudes romantically....

So no one will believe me

I'd rather define myself as a woman...

(Hell, I hate my gender...
I'd rather BE a girl!)

Well...

When it comes to romantics...

I like...
Um...
I like...

What do I like?

To be honest I'm what you call Panse.xual

A se.xuality in which you don't care the persons physical or mental orientation.

So basically, you're cool with anything.

I've just found myself MORE attracted to dudes, but I say every gender-identification (even non-binary) I find attractive.

I know what being Pans.exual means...

Though typically cases such as me are refered to rather as Polys.exual, not caring for an entity's physical or mental state, and is not limited to animals and inanimate objects.

(So yeah, I have about as much of a chance to fall in love with a stranger as I do with my school desk...)

You know...
I feel like I'm not talking like I used to back then...

Have I really changed that much?

That aside, I'm starting to grow tired...
Care to resign for the night?

Either way...

Is that seriously how YOU define yourself? Gender and se.xuality are only defined by the bearer

Anyway, right now I'm tired and must get some sleep.

It just takes some getting used to again. I'm glad you sense the tension as well.

But wow how weird we see, to be locked in similar mindsets.

Well goodbye

*hugs*
Salute

Oh my, I forgot to say good night!

Oh dearie, dearie me, how could I?

Anyways, if you're wondering I was listening to my favourite instrumental music on Youtube....

To be specific, I was listening to the song "Reprise (Promise)" from the game Silent Hill 2.

I've never played the game, but I just love the piano sonata.

......................................................
Well, I've got nothing...

I used to have millions of things on my mind, then I took an arrow to the knee.

(Because... Skyrim Logic...)
(I've never even played that game.)

Yeah Revo, talk to yourself while you wait for the girl to show up...

If she shows up...

(It would probably help if I thought this stuff through before writing it rather than letting a blank mind guide my words...)

Maybe I could paint the walls an interesting color and watch it dry in order to pass the time while I wait...

Ok, so it's obvious that I'm not a fan of waiting...

But even with my lack of patience, here I am... sitting... waiting... doing just about nothing...

That right there is what you call loyalty, and frankly, I have a bit too much of it...

...........................
Gee, is she drawing something? It's 10:30 and there is no sign of life here...

(Wait... I'm life, aren't I?)

............
(Please tell me I won't just be waiting again....)

Hm........

What in heavens could someone be up to...?

(Probably drawing... I mean, isn't that what this app is for?)

Um... I'm going to sleep so...

Have fun drawing and all, if you check back do you mind maybe scheduling a time we may chat and potentiallu catch up to speed for the time it has been...